jude ultra.

6 gORgeous days in Costa Rican paradise fini.

2012-01-27T11:00:00.000-08:00

and… the COastal Challenge comes to a close.
Final day.. crazy hot and exhilarating. Fulfilled spirits, beautiful days. The racers of this years edition where hit with what seems like nothing but heat and sun, long uphills and beautiful vistas. One could say that pain and suffering was also part of that equation however minor next to the camaraderie and spirit displayed all week by the racers, staff, and volunteers.

So..what was i up to all week? …Media. a sort of apprenticeship with the talented LEAD ADVENTURE team. We got up super early every morning to head out on course to capture the racers in all their glory. We'd drive to a location, check it out, try to capture the essence of the day and report the happenings back to a network of media connections. I had a blast working the creative angle and was able to pick up and begin to understand the logistics of covering Media for an event of this size, definitely work i will do again, media work is right up my alley. So in the end... did i feel sad that i wasn't running... perhaps a little however, i found an incredible amount of satisfaction in helping run this event, encouraging the racers, giving my little pep talks about hydration, foot care and i did get to run on course 3 of the 6days between racers and aid station... it was fabulous!!
Results are to be found LIVE at LeadAdvenvture Media

Stage 2 - the longest stage

2012-01-24T12:52:00.000-08:00

62kms and 4280m of cumulative ascent.
A really tough stage for the runners, as they were hit with tempatures in the low to mid 30s with very little to no cloud cover. The first 10km was an aggressive uphill climb with an ascent of nearly 700m.
Myself and the Media crew (the excellence of LEAD Adventures) headed up early to PC2 to capture the leaders. Roiny Villegas (CRC/ELMEC) was leading, closely followed by Damon Goerke of Australia. Chris Barth had fallen behind the leaders as Steve Bremner was closing in.
I luckily got to run a lot of the Afternoon… YEs, you heard me : ) RUN. The best part of day two is by far running along all the wind turbines, nearly 10kms of super high winds, beautiful scenery and endless rolling green hills. I spent a few hours, running back and forth from runner to aid station, encouraging and motivating. I shot a quick video of the wind turbine trail… however i dont have a strong enough connection to upload it or i still lack the skill to figure out how to... here are the leaders in the Expedition category.

1. Damon Goerke - Australia - 6:17:49
2. Roiny Villegas - Costa Rica/Equipo Elmec - 6:26:09
3. Christ Barth - Canadá - 7:54:53
---
1. Laura Hronik - (USA/EE.UU) - 8:47:09
2/3. Kelly Wilson - USA - 9:13:31
2/3. Patricia Ossendack - Costa Rica 9:13:31

Stage One - La Fortuna to Rancho Margot

2012-01-22T15:38:00.000-08:00

Roiny Villegas (CRC / Equipo Elmec) - ©Lead Adventure Media

stage one.
24.3km, 1550m accent
WEather: high 25 (76f), low 17 (62f), humidity %42

To kick off this Year's edition of the Coastal Challenge, nearly 60 runners set off to tackled 24km and 1550m of cumulative accent in some of the region's most beautiful, aggressive mountain trails. Runners started in the small town of La Fortuna, renowned for its beautiful view of Arenal Volcano and its lake which is surrounded my lush, larger then life rolling hills. They climbed Cerro Chato, an extinct volcano formation only to finish on the shores of beautiful Lake Arenal.

Unlike previous years, we experience nothing but sunny weather today. Racers got a real taste of what was to come, as the days will only get hotter, the battle with dehydration and heat exhaustion begins.

Winner of today's stage was no other then my local boy Chris Barth. Chris ran a solid pace today, attempting not to 'POUND' it, but rather ease into a comfortable pace he managed to take top spot; Damon Goerke of Australia taking 2nd only a minute behind, closely followed by local favourite Roiny Villegas (CRC?Team Elmec). Female winner was an incredibly talented Colorodo runner, Keri Nelson of the USA, my bet is that she will do verRRRRy well this week.

Racers then spent the afternoon chillaxing, eating and getting to enjoy the many pleasures Rancho Margot, a completely self-sufficient organic working ranch and in my opinion, one of the most desirable vacationing spots in Costa Rica, in anticipation of tomorrows (and this weeks) longest stage… 62 grueling, hot kms.

1. Christ Barth - Canadá - 2:26:07
2. Damon Goerke - Australia - 2:27:15
3. Roiny Villegas - Costa Rica/Equipo Elmec - 2:30:39
---
1. Keri Nelson - USA - 2:51:47
2. Linda Fuqua-Jones (USA/EE.UU) - 3:30:54
3. Laura Hronik - (USA/EE.UU) - 3:40:34

Arriving in PAradise... with nothing.

2012-01-21T17:49:00.000-08:00

COsta RIca… im minus three hours.

Im in the airplane on my way down to San Jose. I should be arriving in the next three hours.. I've forgotten my digital camera and the footbeds in my running shoes, im already off to a great start. However, i must admit that the stress is much lower then previous years knowing that i am not in neck deep in preps for running the Coastal Challenge. NO fuel prep, no clothes prep, no worrying that i've ran up enough mountains in the past month to ease the suffering… no suffering.. somewhat sad that im missing this incredible opportunity to test myself. HOwever, really looking forward to Staffing the event, being in behind the scenes, helping to make sure things run smooth.

1 day later..
In Costa Rica… no luggage.. wOW..am i ever lucky that im not racing, hahaha…i have a pair of jeans, a dirty tee and shoes with no insoles…haha.

NOn...vraiment...encore.!?

2012-01-08T22:37:00.000-08:00

One week after my New Years 50km, which took a lot out of me, it drained my already weakened post holiday state, i'm strangely standing in the same shoe. I spent the first 3days of the New Year strategically recovering. Which went well, other then catching a bit of a cold bug or perhaps a few early symptoms of over-training (i'll stay on top of the noted possible warning signs).
I'm exhausted, and in super stiff.
My day started out with a 14km am run across to the North Shore with a wicked fast runner friend, Chris Barth. The man is all about speed and pounding it, he has over a decade of experience as a National Cat.1 road cyclist turned elite marathoner. And so, this past year i've had the immense pleasure of watching him shift his values, attitude and incredible skill towards the trail and Ultra world (much different then the road racing world). In a couple weeks time, i'll be following him and a few others race the 2012 edition of the Coastal Challenge (a race i wish i was not missing, but sadly am :(.. but nevermind that. ..i adore following multi-day events and will try to provide all the details here on how to follow the Racers.
So then... Shop Run at Salomons.. Noon came about and it was time to hit the trails for a weekly Sunday Open run. We ran a SoLid hard pace (that was group led, pace is always determined by the skill and experience present), pushed all the hills and loved every second of the flowing down. My comrade on this beautiful, dark rainy day was a great, gREAt fellow... he fully deserves the kudos of a 2x great as he's one of only a handful of individuals like myself who believes that acknowledging others on the trail is both a sign of respect and safety, and we enjoy greeting others. 12-14km later. hard, undulating fartleks.
18:30... must run home, i didn't bring a warm layer to wear...haha ha i'll freeze if i walk..must rUN! So today, what a day.. 3x 14km. wheres my Tiger tail : )

NOw..im home. tired. hungry. and happy.

rECOvery Ouch.. recovery yes.

2012-01-06T20:38:00.000-08:00

January 02, 2012

In times of desperate need (i simply 'NEED' to walk down a flight of stairs without looking like im a 100 yrs old with the range of motion of a pug) we tend to be willing to try it all. We put our trust and hopes into gadgets, super foods, remedies and cleanses; we base our opinions on wHAt?!, reviews, friends, people we know who've used it, tried it, or is it attractive packaging?

12.31 22:37… fell asleep (with glass of wine in hand), feeling overly tired from what seemed like a month of buildup.
happy new years.!

01.01
07:01 wake. coffee.
08:00 warm up run to race start 7km away
09:00 race start, Frozen Ass 50km
….4:38:00 later. finished. stoked : ) 10mins faster then last year. push a steady pace with a rotten belly.
15:00 eating recovery protein meal (beef burger and yam fries, they went down awesome, like a warm blanket for the inside of my acidic, empty belly).
walked home.
bathe. stretch a little but not really.
19:30 bed

01.02
07:00 wake. sort of stretch. coffee.
08:00 walk to work. 13km
10:30 work. Salomon. Lunch. spinach/kale salad, quinoa, chicken, beets, feta, bread and pineapple juice..yum.
18:30 run home.12km im in a world of pain, every step, i feel every bone impact, i try to stay light, be nimble, turn fast..hold up. any turnover will do, my legs feel like lead. i spot a running store.. i would like so very much a roller (i have a home made-thing that works for…some things, not suPEr well but it does the trick…but not really. i stop into a running shop and buy a gadget... the best gadget in the world!!)
20:00 home. ouch. roll ohhh sweet rolling with new silly gadget that feels like heaven covered in chocolate..i LOVE THE TIGER TAIL.!
and i also eat my *Special Power recovery Shake (ingredients are highly depending on what lives in my fridge)

COCONUTY BANANARAMMER POWER SHAKE

1/2 cup Almond milk
1 Frozen (pre-peeled) banana in chunks (this is the KEY to a creamy, thick smoothie)
a quick pour of plain or vanilla yogurt
as above of UDO's 3-6-9 oil blend
1tbsp powdered coconut cream (for the fats)

then add Protein - i like to mix two types together, a whey protein isolate (Naturals is a great choice) to give my muscle the fuel they need asap to start repairing and an additional protein with loads of glutamine, an extra boost to the immune system is always good (my favorite, HAMMER's chocolate RECOVERITE). i mix the two to usual 1-1.5 servings

01.03
my body has been in cold sweats all night, my bed soaked in sweat, im freezing cold, my legs are tingling, my body exhausted. i think i better bus it into work in the morning rather then running.
07:30 wake. coffee.
10:30 off to work on the bus.
19:30 i decide to walk home..12km and meet up with a good friend for a walk..another 5km
.
...legs are feeling fantastic, the TIGER TAIL has been fantastic, what a friend..and it can be your friend too..lol..check out the video below.

01.04 im good physically but i feel like my body is now starting to fight off a cold...arrggggh or perhaps a little over-training?
i feel good... i did something right.. now as per every week i have three whole days of recovery (no pushing limits on body). Cant wait to run to work on Sunday.

the new Year. a fresh start. a NEw FAtasS 50!

2012-01-01T23:45:00.000-08:00

A great start to the New Year. .
After sleeping through the 12 o'clock hour last night, i'll be honest, i felt awful. It strangely felt as though i had miss the gun, the start time. The time came, went and it took the crowd with it... 'Sorry Jude you miss the boat on this one. You'll forever be disorganized!'. Luckily there was more clarity as the day unfolded. Not to mention that we were forecast for slushy rain... and to my surprise, no rain, not a drop. It was a mild, somewhat warm, at times sunny morning. Refreshing. The energy was good. First person i saw this morning was a grumpy little old man, he managed to gruff me a 'good morning' i was moved.
.. the morning of the race (resolution run is also an appropriate name) i easily wake up. No doubt, i had fallen asleep the previous night around 22:30, missing the turn of the year.
..morning comes and its 7:00, i throw on my race kit, a little rubA535 on the legs, compression tights on, toque, gloves, pack, fuel...extra cash.. okay, im good to go. I leave my house just before 8:00 (for a 9:00 start) and set off into a warm-up run to the Brockton Oval in Stanley Park, site of the celebration start... i have 20 mins to get there, im still a ways away, i text a friend and ask him to sign me in; i cut through the aquarium lot and shave off a few minutes, i get in with 5mins to spare :)

'Vancouver's sea walk'

Nice and warmed up, after a great little debriefing and morning greeting we set off to run . I have a wicked first half with a fellow i had also ran the first half with the previous year..ha, imagine that. Then, i had a pretty painful second half; my stomach was off, it had been for a few days (had a few pit stops). The route was fantastic, no surprise there, the rain let off (very cool) and i ran my little heart dry. A steady 4:38:00 5okm for me (plus a 7km warm-up). I had a really great time, it was so nice to be out. Best part was, as off as i felt, i ran 10mins faster then last year : )

Big THanks to Club FatAss and all the volunteers, friends and family who make it all awesome and possible for this event to happen every year.

i'd like to approach everyday this year with this much openness and enthusiasm. and i'd love to keep hacking out the hard miles like those : )

happy NEw Year!!

bonjours SALOMON..

2011-12-17T18:37:00.000-08:00

I've been over thinking a change since my last post. I'm in the midst of finding my routine. ... I laugh, ridiculously over the fact that i just can't articulate the change..
.okay, here goes…
… I'm now with SALOMON. .. …I've left my home at mec. (Mountain Equipment Co-op)
wOW..that was super tough. In fact, I'm sure, this is why its taken me a while to fully transition, to fully express myself in the open. I loved my place at the co-op, i wouldn't have left for anything except a step further into the Mountain Running scene, into a specialty and that's exactly what i received. Lets face it... anyone who really knows me, knows my fetish for feet and gear. i love well made bEAutiful things, i cant help it. I have an eye for detail and design, and i love to develop things. There's a part of me that believes the little French girl inside me was and has always been built for this.. i feel i am exactly where i should be.
I'm sUPer Stoked to be coming in with Salomon and their brand new Concept shop in West Vancouver, beautiful British Colombia Canada. This shop is ONE of three of its kind. The other two are in Chamonix France and Moscow Russia... hOW WiLd is that!.
What this means to me: a more specialized hand in the TRail Running world as both retailer and ambassador; seeing and using the coolest, newest evolving technologies; a larger involvement in the local North Shore trails and events; a role encouraging and inspiring a community of local trail runners;
..aND ... a definite peRK.. i get to commute again..woot woot. 11-14km, depending on the route, i can weave from park walkway to forest (Stanley Park) trails almost the entire distance or cut through Vancouver's downtown for a quick urban flavor. Both beautiful routes.. Ive covered just a few kms short of 300 since i started 3 weeks ago. My loVE TAnk is very full these days.
.. and i like that.

It is your work in life that is the ultimate seduction. - Pablo Picasso

...

Ohh and check this OUt! Sunday & Wednesday Salomon Shop Runs (from Park Royal)... woot woOT, how fun! A wicked opportunity to hit the trails with other runners, a great way to push oneself. If you're brand new to the trails and you're nervous, no worries, the trail and its people are always welcoming. You can also simply pass me an email jultra7@gmail.com
to everyone else, its a great opportunity to commit to a New Year date with the running shoes.. in the Capilano trails with friends.

the cOMing of Winter.

2011-11-14T23:28:00.000-08:00

The cold is moving in. ..im dreaming of warmer places..lol
im sipping on a foamy cappuccino… im not happy about that…i hate foam. My sister told me earlier that a cappuccino was just like a latte (which is hot milk with a shot of coffee) but with the shots of coffee poured on top rather then milk poured over coffee (espresso to be accurate)…however :( it is not, you've certainly misinformed Josee or perhaps i didn't recall exact what you said? Either way, im a Simple kind of girl..i loVE coffee with a whitener of sorts and often a sweetener, make it as you'd like, i just love coffee..so in the excitement of trying something new i order a faNCy drink, a cappuccino… a cappuccino is half foam…yuk. i hate foam (its not a drink, i ordered a drink, liquid not foam..arrRRgg.. what?!?)… so brilliantly, instead of staying quiet, and having a hORrible customer experience, muttering on of rants of injustice and humanity, drinking a warm drink that i didn't care for… i went and politely asked my barista to quickly educate me on how to ask for what i really wanted which was a decaf latte (its 8pm and im not sleeping as it is) with the shots poured on top (very little foam)… oh yummy.. much better, and with a smile it was no problem, she was the sWEEtess gal and she found a fEW WArm giggles on my sisters' lack of coffee knowledge..lol (sorry JOsee, i might have embellished your character for comical value :) and i had a much better experience…easy as that.
…
.however i feel my rant on humanity was justified.
Earlier, i had witness an act of cruelty and brutality, my heart ached. It was mid-morning, i was running into NOrth Vancouver to really explore the local trail/mountain networks. I was running along the goRGeous coastal sea wall that runs through our famous Stanley Park to the Lions Gate bridge. The crowd thickened and i slowed. To my left, 100m away, across the beach, on the waters edge… are half a dozen police officers surrounding a homeless-looking man. They were slowly moving in, guns pointed. Theres now a lot of people watching from the side-lines.
..The man is frightened, the pack is closing in on him, like a scared animal, he ducks low and try to make a run for it, the police jump on him and start beating him down in the sand and water. A women 10feet from me starts to cheer… my chest is collapses, i feel like throwing up, my head is pounding, i have no right to witness this and do nothing, i move on past the hooting lady and throw out at her 'WHy are you cheering, the MAn is frightened!'..im sure she had no idea what i was seeing or talking about. I run off…It wasn't right, there was no need for a police collapse, no need for such an extreme take down, then again, who am i to make the call, im blind to the situation… ive thought back and wondered if i really saw what i did..?.
..so now i sit with my latte. I cant sleep, no worries its decaf. My mind is restless. Ive been running hard these past few weeks and it feels great. My body is tired. I want to sleep, to recover but theres so much to be done, yet i really don't have the mental capacity to get those things accomplished, its a viscous cycle… my brain feels rotten.
..
..so on a different note.
im almost two weeks into my 100days of movement, and for the most part its going quite well. Ive managed to run almost everyday except the couple of days a week i spend all day with my little guy which we've managed to cover between 10-15km of simply walking from park to park, i usually end up carrying him on my shoulders 3/4 of the way through, so it becomes a great strength workout as well. I feel i need to make more effort to stretch and do strength work at home. This Wednesday is pretty exciting too, i'll be trying Hot Bikram Yoga for the first time…wish me luck.
.. and then there's ..My second metatarsal on my right foot is still an issue. A few months back at Wasatch100 i had tripped up in a hole and twisted something, i think a mild fracture, and all this speedwork has really been aggravating it, but im taking good care to take it easy, mostly, and pull back if too much pain starts to develop.
… i find it hard to believe that i lack the ability or self-care to do as i preach. Come to me with an injury or issue and i'll have a pretty darn good idea on how to make it heal or better, and im sure what i do to my own body would never be in that advice..lol.
... oh yes.. i remember cold weather means hot weather elsewhere.. like my absolute favorite, the Country that has stolen my heart.. COsta Rica.

the 'route of fire' is very dear to my heart. A 6 DAy footrace covering half the length of Costa RIca, a beautiful volcanic, tropical landscape, drylands, wind-turbines, rock and ocean. You run a set, achievable distance everyday, recover, socialize, eat, enjoy the incredible beauty of your surroundings and company and sleep comfortably 'eNOUgh' each night in tents. You wake to a delicious breakfast (that is by the way.. incredibly enough cooked by a dedicated and loving local family, they have been cooking for this event year after year watching the 'bEAUtiful and Inspiring' effort everyone contributes, wonderful Team and aWESome local cuisine, the fruits and veggies were my favorites...oh yum yummy! ...only to finish at this perfect little paradise bugalow getaway for the final night of celebration with fellow comrades and friends. Two years ago, i sat out on the fifth day due to crazy medical conditions, therefore 'gave my race up' :( it still saddens me, however i hold onto the incredible adventure and sense of accomplishment it left me with, the connections i made with the Racers, the Volunteer and the Race Team. It was really something, i recall too, Erik (Staff) later collected racer's sneakers to donate to Costa Rican school kids in need of footwear (awesome in so many ways..for the kids and for USA customs..haha).... a running vacation that allowed me and everyone else who came out a challenging environment in which to grow in, to alter ones life in, i came back a changed person, a stronger person.. somehow with a slight amount of more courage, empathy and belief in humanity. ..if your looking for a little umf to spruce up your New Year (lets think ahead here).. i guess everyone is always looking for a way to live life and looking for suggestions on things to do, work towards, enrich...Lifes what you make it ..even if you only ever do it once.. like skydiving :)
but as far as footraces go
.
..i'll tell you this.. :)
the surest wAY to connect with people is to suffer with them.
.
..that said, nothing good comes without work, so in spirit of Movement (and humanity, challenge yourself to become a better version of yourself), i propose this as a bit of a challenge to you all...
.. Gather a Team ..to head to Costa RIca for Jan 21-28 2012, theres two main options
.Option One - a Team of 3. You each will run together every day for 6 days, you can choose to run the entire course (~230km) or enter the 'adventure' category and run half that distance over 6 days.
.Option Two - A two-man relay. Each runs 3 of the days, your strategic choice :)
.The run starts just north of SanJose. Its a point to point, so each day you run from and arrive at a different location..slowly making your way to the finish line. After your day of running its all about eating great food and chatting it up with all the awesome characters or simply taking in the gorgeous warm weather, forests and beaches you experience everyday.
..
..Check all the races details online, it a wicked fun adventure. The entire six days is taken care of for you, you just bring yourself and your stinky run stuff. Follow this link and use the codeword "coastal" without the parenthesis... you'll receive a 20% discount for ... OR choose a FREE RACE ENTRY to any 2012 location for (Lost Worlds Trail Series) (good thru Nov and December), any questions can be directed straight to info@thecoastalchallenge.com, they're fantastic with quick responses to your concerns and inquires.
..
.... ha hahahaa and heres a great chuckkler for those who remember Bikini Girl :)
Elusive “Bikini Jogger” Enlivens, Perplexes Bernal Heights

.100 dAys of MOvement.

2011-11-01T01:25:00.000-07:00

photo: Rich Wheater.

There's no time like the now..
so on a whim, like many things in my Life i decided to jump on board to one bRiLLiant girl's idea of inspiring a community to Live healthy and active Lifestyles.
..
.100 dAys of MOvement.
.what does that mean? .. .

..for me..
these last few months have been a transition with my racing season ending late September, i was searching for deeper purpose. Many parts of Life are, i sadly admit in Limbo, however it seems im seeing light in the development of my hormonally imbalanced confusional state. In other words, im snapping out of this in between period of Life.. refocusing :)

100 dAys of MOvement.
..
.i have a weakness in consistency..
CAn i overcome my inability to focus..
..
.100 days, everyday, 30 minutes of intentional heart-pumping activity.
i will train smart and efficiently and set high running goals. i will find consistency in a yoga practice. i will stress less, eat more greens and learn to LOve sleep. i will pass on the knowledge i have to inspire others to 'Live ACTively' to enjoy a healthy happy Life.

..
.and this 100 dAys will kick off with a 7am rUN.. little steps.. little steps. (*hint, start your first dozen days with easily accomplishable goals, 30 minutes of activity you know you can do… walk a dOG.. or my favourite… grab a coffee and walk till you get tired, then turn around (unless you've hit the 3hr mark, a 6hr walk is a bit much.. time best used in mOUNtains).

interested in challenging yourself? check this out for.. http://movementx100days.blogspot.com/
FaceBook Page

the cHApter concludes..

2011-09-12T16:36:00.000-07:00

if it would have been easy, i more then likely would have learned nothing about myself.

WHat happened? .. ...hard to say. ..lets bounce around ...MillCreek Aid Station, i drop (literally) a cold LOnely collapse. no one i know or knows me within 1500kms, other then my pacer, whom i'd met just 8.5miles ago.. i had NO one (logic kicks in 'what if i push over that line and have to be hospitalized, theres no one here with me.' Poorly organized trip ended up with me driving myself alone 1500 kms to Utah, USA, attempt to race my first 100mile race with no support at Altitude (i live at sea level), then drive home the 1500 kms). REally!?! there's a flaw in this plan... and im anxious, i spend my last two days in Vancouver with hourly mini-anxiety attacks.. no fun. i just couldn't afford to have that 'fight to the death' mentality or perhaps i simply didn't feel the 'need' to prove that i had it. didn't matter. by that time i had no choice i was blank, shivering madly, internal organs spasming in intervals.. vertigo. cold. veRTIgo.. ah aye yaaaaa! . ... make it stOP! ...
.
..8, 9 miles ago i sat in a chair, the sUN WAs setting, i was in rough shape.. however .there was also light and 'hope'... a man who brought me to a chair and fed me, a beautiful woman who cared for me, kept me calm and on task, a handsome wise man with powerful words, a genuine belief in me . ..and an easy-loving, fast talking solid fellow who offered to pace me to the end. ..'yah.. PUSH THROUGH this, not a problem.. it all mental.. its mental.. is it mental?.. cramps..ouch, i've been sick for the past 12 hrs.
.. so what is happening and how can i turn this around. Heat. Altitude. Minimus and talus = blisters, ouch. I've had loads to drink, but my eating has slowed right down since the heat and the poops have come on.. WALK, i can walk…ohhH but its not helping, this too shall pass, im sure of it… slowly and painfully.
..
.( a computer malfunction and poof.. 3hrs worth of inner thoughts and writing, gone. why are lessons always taught the tough way. I thought i learned to save files ages ago when we first started using computers, i've been taking autosave for granted.. machine does more and i think less..)
..so again.
ha. rather suiting actually. i write this again.
.
im under prepared, my season lost focus when i jumped the gun to race the Expedition Adventure race. I don't have the mileage, i don't have the legs, i forgot about altitude, thought that perhaps it was simply going to be a mental battle. I wasn't prepared for it. I winged it and it showed. Why would i wing a race like this, the 2nd toughest 100miler in the USA next to Hardrock (so i've been told). ..perhaps to be humbled.
..
i know now, all that i can do is move on. REflect on my mistakes, be proud of myself for what i did accomplish (heck… i still ran just over 100kms of some of the gnarliest mountains). Stay positive and plan for the next.
..What is next?
I have no more races this season, and im feeling good about that. Back to basic, back to the buildup and next season I won't be loosing focus, i will strategically crawl through the Ultra World, find my place. FInd where it is i am needed, find how to make my impact, a positive impact in my Life and the lives of others. I will prepare properly and be ready for the races, ready for the distance. I will be kinder to my body, and do as i preach. I will take in and use all the great advice i've received these last few months. I will continue to work my way to the world stage. I will continue to build an Ultrabody, one that never quits, one that moves quickly and one that can inspire others to do the same, push through their own personal barriers that limit our worth and accomplishments. I am nowhere near my PEak, and thats a great feeling, i have the potential to be so much stronger then this :)

SO move on , i WILL. I bombed my first 100miler, and thats okay… i will try again!
The big decision now comes in how i will structure next years' season? I have a feeling that i should recruit good help to guide me.. to bring my 'I CAN DO ANYTHING!' attitude down one notch to a more realistic level and then have a backup plan for flexibility.

6 DAys til WASATCH 100...

2011-09-03T17:55:00.000-07:00

florence + the machine.

TOur de vANCouver

2011-08-31T21:17:00.000-07:00

i have an 8 hour timeslot, i need to fit in a rUN. yoU COUld call it work, as i at times do, i like work, like running UltraMarathons, its comfortable (and hard) to be running a part-time job a week, thats running between 18-28 hours easy (pain-free of course). So today, I need hiLLS (some flats), i need elements (heat, wind..) and i need time on my feet to really simulate what i may face during my upcoming UM (ultramarathon).
If i am tiREd, if i am soRE… GOod! I always try to mimic how uncomfortable it is to work under such condition. It's also a way to mentally train my mind to push when it's weak or tired. There's so much mental strength needed to run an UM. If you ask me..'i've run a 50k, do you think i could run a 100mile?'.. yOU got your answer right there, you cant think you can, you have to know you can, you have to feel it in your heart, be willing and open to push that hard. I say that because, 20hrs into a run (heck 10hrs) you seriously always question yourself, you doubt yourself, your worth, your will… and you need that mental strength to remind yOU of who you are and why it's so important for you to accomplish this… what meaning does the 100mile have other then athletic distinction. What demons do you run from, what changes do you run to…

back to my 8hr slot. So.. id like to rUN.. 'where shall i go?'
hiLLS… 'Right, i need those'. I decide i should go climb our infamous death hill 'the Grind', why not… all the tourists do :) it took me 52mins after a +2hr run through the city to get there, according to Grouse Grind standards, i'm not very fit, 45mins is fit, 35 is elite…lol.. oh well, i can keep going forever, thats my strength. Then i descend the BCMC ( a parallel trail to the grind), run pass the Capilano river, dip my legs and rUN home, 8.5hrs later im finally home... that was fun :) Wasatch is now only a week away.

Trail Facts
Length: 2.9 kilometres (1.8 miles)
Elevation Gain: 853 metres (2,800 feet)
Base: 274 metres above sea level (900 feet)
Summit: 1,127 metres (3,700 feet)
Total Stairs: 2,830
record: 23:48 held by Sebastian Salas

PART ThRee - Raid the NOrth eXTREMe - the reality of Mt. DOrval

2011-08-19T11:05:00.001-07:00

the next links to the beginning and middle of this story.

PART ONE - Raid the NOrth eXTREMe - an uNFolding

PART TWo - Raid the NOrth eXTREMe - dreams, nightmares and grumpy bodies.

part III -

There's a large part of me that struggles to retell the story hOW it was. HOw it happened in me, in my mind… at 102 hours on 8:35hrs of total sleep. As 'feelings' process, i objectively look back still feeling a little angry and confused inside (the angry is the French Taurus in me), i go on and complete the retelling of this most excellent journey.

the task: we'd come to the entrance gate of the ValHallas.. and no one was truly feeling themselves. All we had to do was head almost straight up to a col, through some mountains, around some lakes and down the other side… simple.

'the black markers are US, Team 17.. the green marks are a most excellent choice route'

We had just left the alpine lodge, crossed a creek and had our 'intense' misunderstanding.. T2 says,

'Jude, here is my advice to you. Stop talking, stop questioning he knows where he's going.. just follow, You're going to make him lose it, he'll snap.!'

..i knew she was right, but i couldn't stop reacting. We were not where we should be and we needed to react as a Team towards a solution but there no communication, there's no working together. T3 refuses help with the navigation and there off… bushwhacking, traversing through once again some gNArly side-laying Alder and large talus slopes heading towards what was believed to be the col to Hird Lakes. Im freAKing out inside, my bloods boiling.. 'is this for REAL.. aRE YOu kiddin' me?!
..
…So what do you do in a situation as such? i had to stop my questioning, it was getting us nowhere. T3 was not listening, T2 adores and follows whatever is best for T3, T1 wants 'zero' conflict knowing it would most likely end up in harsh confrontations… as my actions were quickly steering us. Had to Stop, had to follow. I take the very back of the line for the greatest distance (20-30m) from 'the' leader (plus a little more 'zen' in my artificial lonesomeness)… which also takes me out of any possible decision making. Knowing this, i let go and follow.. aNGry, fuming… muttering, replaying events , respeaking them in different ways, trying to make sense of what did and isn't happening. I'm trying to figure out just how we can get through this, working with one another. Where are the loopholes, whats the answer, how will we get along and pull through this? Whats even going on… am i over-reacting, do i know for sure if we're heading the wrong way? ..I'd looked at the maps just a few quick times this past week, how well could i really remember them? i had, however, helped lay out most of the UTM coordinates and instructions the night we received the maps… i don't know?! do i know?… what do i know, what does it matter, we all have to go the same direction, we all finish together.. no matter where the finish is. So where's my part, where can i be most useful?…
.. after what seemed like a few hours more of bushwhacking across a steep sidehill, we get to a large talus slope leading up to a bowl with a col to the next mountain range.

Phew.. awesome, this steep side traverse was really sketchy, i was happy to get into some lower risk exposure. So most naturally, i decide that the safest, quickest route is up onto a steep little chunk of stable vegetation, then a gradual traverse passed the bowl and over the col. T3 had a different plan, he wanted to keep heading up the talus slide to higher elevation before traversing… baaaaah …'NO, lets get off this huge Talus field, its super unstable, there are hUGE loose boulders… this is a STUPID place to make elevation, wait 100ft, we'll be on good snow.' … but of course, he hears no reason, so i leave the team for a quick few minutes and route out a safer way up.. either way, made little difference, but it was the tension building, gave me a few moments to chill out, recollect and remind myself again to just follow.
…
.a little over 200m away is our col. We hit some good snow, yaHOOo, no more bushwhack or talus.. We just need to traverse slowly upwards. a little steep to and over and fini.

Still not quite able to shave off all the sass i call over to T3.. ' ya'mind actually kicking in a good step or edging, you're rounding your steps'… and the response i get…' look Jude, the bottom of my feet really hurt, I'M NOT kicking my feet in, you do it'.. 'WELL THEN…. fine…, take the back and round all the steps you want, I'll edge in and I'll make us all solid steps to follow'. besides my runners were the only ones with decent sized nubs for traction, i was able to make route and i had the extra energy to ensure us a safe climb. That said, the closer we were getting to the col the steeper it looked. I hadn't been able to see the maps since we'd departed from the lodge, but i certainly didn't remember our col to be this steep, but… we were here now, what could we do but continue on.

.. just under 100m the grade changed. By this time, i was holding my poles out in front of me horizontal to my route, there was only ONE direction and that was up. It wasn't super steep as i started, i was on a somewhat perfect avalanche slope, 47ish degrees, kicking in serious steps into slushy summer snow. AS my knees started to comfortably hit the snow, my poles at bent arms length and chest height, and the position of my body almost near vertical. This was steep and we were high, no matter… i focus on my impact, the set up to follow my tracks and a 2m radius of snow around me. I'm nearly stepping a ladder, a vertical WEst COast ladder, focus…, don't look around as Vertigo would certainly be a possibility and then a fast dangerous ride down 300m of talus and patchy snowfields into a freezing, glacial puddle… yUK! just keep going, just keep going..holy poop, this is steep, don't look around, just keep climbing up.

'looking vertically down over the melted cornice at the top, you cant see our tracks as its much too steep, about 90 m down you start to see the route'

..i top the half melted cornice… wOW…and my heartrate sKYROckets…. 'Shhhhh… wait for the team juDE, don't freak', i say aloud. I walk not but 10ft from where i topped to the other edge of the cOL. /.hehe haa ..yikes… its a STEEP 250ish meters down a scree field drop to a LArge lake inside a deep bowl… 'aaHhh, I'm not sure what to think, i understand the risk we are currently faced with much too well. I'm scared, this sucks, i have no roCK gear (no crampons, no axe, no rope) there is no safe way down.

'the view on the other side'

The team all make it up.. we're safe .i can't even remember their reactions.. all i remember was T2 saying, 'i think i see a trail there, yah over there, we can take this down.' and shouting back in response, 'i wont do it, you have no idea the risk, i wont go down that way, no race is that important… I HAVE A BOY Who needs a MOmmy. Knowing well by this time this was the complete wrong col, we were up on a knife edge .. forward is a super steep (not quite vertical) 250m slide to a HUge Alpine lake and behind us a 90m drop to another 200m into a rocky puddled bowl. The safest direction is back, but that means climbing back down the 90 or so meters i just vertically climbed, again..no crampons, axe or rope.. sounds stupid. We argued over our next moved, i argued we were near Mt Dorval, but egos are reluctant to confirm.

On the up and up… we had the most incredible views, a total 360 panorama of countless mountains :) and i was surprisingly warmer then the previous few nights. WE then decided to put on all our warm layers and figure something out. My runners, the LaSportiva Crossover GTX, an excellent choice, however pretty wet and somewhat cold from hours of snow kicking and days trekking but luckily i had over packed and also brought my NB Minimus with me :) great call as i slipped my little feet into a dry, light, run slipper, dry socks (big THanks to T2).. wool toque, threw on all my insulated layers, my down, hardshell, emergency blanket wrapped around my core, inside the e-bivy and wrapped in a silnylon scout tarp… the team did the same.

..We'd pushed our 'help' button on our spot tracker, I'd ripped through the duct tape of our emergency radio… that was it.. the end to our official race. No one was happy, and luckily i felt zero need to point fingers as conversation would of been nothing but destructive. I remained silent and mostly to myself, i focused on the radio, spot and solution. ..the radio was not working.. hmmmm.. no good. Does anyone know we're here? Has our spot sent out a signal? Is our radio sending and just not receiving? I had followed the instructions given to me in the 'emergency situation' brief. Push the 'help' on spot, open radio, find channel, send out message, wait max 30mins. …T2 was anxious and NOT as patient, 'hand me the radio', quite worried about having to spend the night at nearly 8000ft with nothing but handfuls of emergency blankets. She was right to be concerned so she decided that T3, being the only one with somewhat crampons (Kahtoola spikes), should carefully backtrack to the lodge and alert the crew of our location. Fine by me… i said nothing.

'Tm (im taking the photo), T1 and T2 all snuggled up, preparing for a cold night at nearly 8000 ft'

'T3 on the other side of the col, somewhat boycotted, mostly due to a stomach virus'

Uncomfortably, but safe the three of us slept. We'd heard nothing from T3, as he'd left hours ago, no contact with the radio and we had no way of knowing if our spot tracker was working. No matter, i was calm, by morning we'd for sure have a solution. Someone would know we were up here.

...i opened my eyes, the sUN was golden, just starting to rise when all of a sudden a handsome face appears in my view, 'gOOD MOrning LAdies'. Good looking Help had arrived with snow anchors, ropes and gear. They proceeded to make us hot tea and lend us extra layers to fully warm up. One of them was off scouting a route and decided we could traverse the ridge out and around to the proper col, a much better idea then a costly helicopter rescue. We would then wait for T3, who had slept the night at the lodge, to meet us on the right route to continue on our way out of here in hopes we may still have time to at least ride the 7summits to the finish line... Didn't happen but at least we were all somewhat tolerating each other more and more as the day went by.

my final reACtions to this Adventure, in somewhat disbelief, turned out to be way different then i had ever imagined. The physical was easy, i was well prepared, even my riding skills were good. The uphill was easy, i could ride it, although we seemed to have walked a lot of it, my downhill was alright, i kept up, although we never did much downhill riding. My feet stayed in great condition... thank you lube and leuko tape. Nothing broke on my bike... Where things did go wrong was with our team. We werent working together and it reflected huge on our performance or lack there of. No one had roles, except 'the' navigator, which was just plain silly and irritating. We all had very different fitness levels, which was fine, we went as fast as our slowest, unfortunately our slowest was NOT making cutoffs. I wish i could say i had a great time, a fun time but i didn't. I was hoping for a silly, have fun when the going gets tough kinda team... but no, there was no funny business on our team, only annoyed characters who disliked fluffy bunny singing... oh well.

.This was my first expedition race and that part of it rocKEd, the course was stellar, tough and super challenging as far as terrain went. The adventure was wild, the other racers inspiring and the race Crew... aWESOme, HUGE Thanks to Chris, MA, Brad & Geoff... you guys were there every step of the way, cheering us on and keeping us safe...

For now, I'm soOO ready to let this go. Ive yet to fully process the entire race but i wish to give it no more time. Tomorrow morning i race 5PEaks Whistler, I'm very excited to be on my own two feet again, racing only with myself :) I hope to perhaps one day find a fun-loving Adventure team to race with however i think i have a few more years of strictly Ultra to run.

biG THanks to my Team, Mandatory Equipment... take the good with the bad. This team was made up of good people, with big hearts and each their strengths. I think the weakness came in conflicting personalities but from what i've been told, it could have been worst :) ...i could have sang musicals. :)

24 dAys...

2011-08-14T00:48:00.000-07:00

till my first 100mile race...

oh hOW i LOve my miniMUs..

2011-08-11T09:44:00.000-07:00

and..

PART TWo - Raid the NOrth eXTREMe - dreams, nightmares and grumpy bodies.

2011-08-09T19:28:00.000-07:00

Being alone has never felt so good. Since spending the last three weeks with others in my presence 24/7 ive notice my tank is empty.. yes i believe, i believe i am displaying some slightly introverted behaviour. It seems that i am able to recharge my energy by spending time alone. So why am i needing to be alone? … the dreams and nightmares.

The day i hurt my arm one week pre-RTNE to now (nearly four weeks later), ive been having huGE problems sleeping. Three factors contribute to my lack of sleep.

factor #1: a week before the RTNE, i took a bail on the mountain bike, landed with my arm up and snap, tore something around my bicep under my deltoid. The stupid part of me is that i haven't seen anyone about it yet and theres been very little improvement in its condition, if anything its getting worst. Theres been nights ive woken up with little to no breath, a tight compression to the chest, a strain in the shoulder and a very numb arm.?

factor #2: the dreams.. they wont stop, i cant close my eyes without drifting off into another dimension of current affairs or and into a mix of memories past. Memories of fear and insecurity, moments of complete weakness, instances of sheer panic, my sleep is of low recovery quality.

factor #3: my body's physical reaction to 'sURVival mODE'. NOt sure why.. but ive yet to reALLy relax from this adventure. My body is only now coming out of the fight/ flight response. I feel like the race was incomplete.. i had more to do..? more fight inside.. so naturally, this is causing me some stress :)

so im not sleeping which throws off my nutrition therefore slowing my recovery… but my body feels goOD, i felt GOod on day six, it's my mind which has been slow to recover. im GRUMPY, irritable.. short. .. …until, that is.. SUnday when i finally returned to work :) (for those who don't know.. i work at the coolest place in the outdoor sport community, the co-op [mec]… a place to share a passion for the Outdoors CUlture and a place where GEar (pprrrrrr) is BOrn… brought to the people :) discussed, studies, tested.. bEATen, reviewed and iMPRoved! :) i loVE GEar.! i loVE promoting Outdoor health, awareness and recreation. i love sharing 'zeal' with others :)

so.. i decide that on my return to my lonely suite from this vacation of travel and 'daNGerous opPOrtunity', that i will not have contact with anyone for one day, no biggie right?!… wrong :( .. i miss a gnarly 5PEaks race and cheering on my local friends, i missed a friends birthday, and a mountain top biG VAncouver FIreworks show.. how sad am i :[…? but on the fLip - hOW Stoked am i.? to have an entire day all to myself, a day to be quiet, turned in and tune out with the mental processing of 'daNGerous opPOrtunity' growth.

PART TWo..

So.. daWN was arriving and we headed up a long winding forest service road. Surprisingly I felt strong, my breakdown had past, i warmed my bones, i knew what i had to do to continue… make good decisions and to continually conduct risk assessments in our decision making process. Sounds easy… but as the hours.. days passed the trails got tougher and it was made clear to me to look down, shut up and follow (again, my fluffy bunny hurt)

We'd bedded down for three hours. i woke up dreaming of a strange presence sleeping behind me, protecting me, a panic, it jumps on me and i wake. WE're up… and now off we were back on our bikes for a 7mile (or so?) uphill ride on old dirt roads.. fine, great, it was lovely to spin out the legs. In almost the granny gear with a tight core, i was easily leading the path with T1 (a wicKED rider!) … just focus on hydration and nutrition..zone out, wrong turn.. up some more… Bbrrrrrr ' need to move quicker, im getting coLD'.. still riding, hit snow, heavy fog, rain.. clears up ..down a gNArly narrow, singletrack zigzagging off a +7000ft trailhead. The trail would of been bEAUtiful to ride… but heres the deal.. im NOT Super confident on a bike, after my risk assessment i came to the conclusion that it would be much safer for me to rUN it carrying my bike :) im soLid on my feet. The trail was about a foot wide and switchbacked an avalanche slope. It was covered in fallen logs from the winters damage. Thankfully we hit it in the daylight, id heard horror stories of the previous night's sUPRise LOg attacks.. yuk! To my advantage, i kept up with my team just fine since they would stop to dismount at every log crossing..[ *mental note: will need to improve my technical downhill riding skills and comfort.] .and off the single track onto the funnest part of the race… open downhill, faST.. DIrt road descent.! waaahooO!

..into the TA, welcomed by familiar faces of incredible volunteers and crew. 'allo.!.. woohoo. yah!' a few quick story exchanges and into a quick transition, change wet clothes, its warm but im super chilled, i throw an emergency blanket around my core, wetsuit tank and dry top..im coLD.. eat, and into the front of one canoe.

RIght away, i notice the sharp pain in by arm and chest, it numbs by entire right side… i cant push through this 'T3, im going to paddle canoe style as to keep my arm lower, i still had a pretty powerful canoe stroke (we'd brought kayak paddles for the canoe to gain speed)'… no biggie, right ?..and the conflict explodes. T3 ' NO.. your throwing off my stride, im having to overcompensate on my left, it wont work!'.. ARe you kidding me? 'My stroke is STRAIGHT, the wind is pushing to shore, its high winds and thats why were pushing to the left'.. the argument goes on, theres no reasoning with T3, im looking for a solution, to not throw myself out of the race early and they're inflexible to my weakness when i clearly recall readjusting pace for their poor uphill abilities on the trek and bike… besides the point, my canoe stoke is powerful and we had sails (as we hit big mid-day winds). okay, enough winning.. tENSions were high. Attitudes and EGos are butting, im getting angry and frustrated at the disREspect. ..other words - my fluffy bunny's feelings are being hurt by a biG mean bUlly.

..into the TA, we're taking 1.5hrs and planning for (max) 36hours of trekking/bushwhacking into and out of the ValHallas. I over pack warm clothes and food, i fear it'll be a coLD one. I catch a FRench MAn's eye (he looks hungry, im holding a bag of pepperoni stixs).. 'want one?' he accept, i have a feeling i'll meet him again. Its been 54 or so hours on 3.5hrs sleep, im tired. I then run into a most pleasant character… Mr. Sinister himself.. but sadly, they're having to drop, their gal is hacking up some serious stuff..(most importantly, it seems to sit well with their spirits) and then the swEETest, kindest act. ..'juDE, would you like more food, take whichever you'd like.. chocolate.. please help yourself :)'. wOW… i mean.. wOW! i will Love you forever.. you have found the key to my heart… fUEL.. foOD… thank you.. especially for the oh HEnry! it was enjoyed through the creation of a bond. (i had brought no chocolate of my own for this race (chocolate being my favourite FUEL of all) in fear it would be a melted mess). It was such a 'most excellent' gesture of utter generosity, i am forever grateful.. ..

…off we go on a pleasant, mellow 8km assent to that cruel and unforgiving Beatrice. We start in the early evening, 5ish, by the time dusk was sweeping overhead we were beginning to hit a consistent upward trend :) it was well used trail compared to what we'd seen in the last few days… so DArk hits and i get hit with another 'sleep monster' visit (65 hours in, 3.5hrs sleep).. my friend CAffeine… mMmm.. fuel :] pops from T1s hand 'juDE eat, stay awake'.. ok, a found focus and then randomly, the 'sPice Girls' (yes.. the Brit Pop Sensations) pop into my head… who.. reaLLy?!. ..if you want to be my lover.. na na naaa na..

..We proceed to follow a rAGEing stream/ waterfall leading up around 4900ft at the Alpine Lake Beabitch.. i mean Beatrice. The goal of the game is to reach the other side of the Lake :) ha! WE (go teamwork) all decided it was best that we bed down before what we anticipated to be a moderately tough navigational bushwhack.

… as we get to the Lake, we notice a fire, there a Team, Pentathlondesneiges, up here and they've build a solid, well situated fire, they're up chitchatting, we ask to join the warmth. im coLD, cold in the bONEs.. A few moments of warming and then off to sleep. I lay down a thin ground tarp and we all hop into our emergency bivys and snuggle close. .. i spend hours trying to sleep in discomfort with my arm, chest/shoulder injury, not wishing to shift as the whole Team is snuggled sleeping. . .. its three hours later.. im fed up, i haven't slept a wink, im shivering, im soaked from my emergency bivy space blanket. .. The fire's still going. T1 notices my increased shivering and irritation, my stubbling, my lack of conscious comprehension, she calmly suggest we move to the fire 'goOD idea, im in!'. My other teamates notice the sudden situation and start to over-react in complete lack of control, they're creating too much commotion, i ignore them. In contrast…over by the fire, Mr.FRench (from the pepperoni exchange) sees right away whats happening. He's laying perpendicular to the fire with a wall of warm rocks build up. He signals me over and proceeds to warm me up, protectively in behind. He stuffs warm rocks under my outer layers warming my core, i released control. IT was a very calm, strategic response… im cold, im shivering uncontrollably, i have to accept this warmth, control my breath and warm my core tempature.. 'juDITh..' says Mr.FRench, 'manger juDITh, manger', it was a very equable, strong voice simply and kindly telling me what had to be done. He's feeding me jujubes, my body burns them for fuel.. heat.. oh..yUuum, sweet heat. i slowly warm… woH.!, that was an uncomfortably close bad situation. I pull through, i hate the cold and we continue on our way.

...the ..(im so lost for words) . .. the bushwhack around the large lake was like no other.. sooO BAd, that i was just don't want to mentally revisit it.

..we started on the low forest floor, there was moderate leafy vegetation that only thickened with the hours. We head south, attempt to stay around the 1500-1600m lines, but rather shoot high then drop low, bounce up and down, in and around cliffs.. it was never-ending. AS the forest thinned in high trees, the terrain sharply steepened, the ground vegetation inundated our bodies. We'd made two forest friends that day. One was helpful, strong low laying Alder, although at times it was nothing but a gymnastic maze of duck and jump.. or crawl and stand. The other a clingy, fragile nuisance that punctured your skin in numbing, burning sensations, the return of dEVils Club. ..yuk.

(*one of the funniest moments on trail. T2 and i decided that we would return home and grow the dEVils CLub, only to torture it and find ways to pain it, kill it.. siCK right?!.. 3.5hrs sleep in 80hrs of racing, i believe might make one crazy. Most importantly we had smiles on our faces and giggles in our hearts (as Sinister as they might have been). WE were sharing our suffering through jokes, pushing on, thats all we could do… move forward zigzagging through cliffs and pricky shiiiii… stuff.!

Tired, we bed down for 20mins in the warm afternoon sun. im ALIVE, ready to go again. T3 is not, he stubbles incoherent. I strategically force him to let me see his maps, and 'suggest' a line most suited to our next point, tired beyond belief he accepts my help. .. .We continue to a clear spot under a few ginORMous old growth Cedars and decide to bed down again. The decision was to bed down for the night as continuing to bushwhack at night would be murderous, however it was only 16:00ish.. that means we'd be down for 15+hrs.. ridiculous. T2 and i argue about the dangers of a fire in such a sensitive location vs. the over-dramatized survival of the team. WE find common ground and light a small, controlled fire. Each one of us (except T3 as he needed to sleep more then the rest of the team) taking turns

watching and keeping the fire.. it was a loOOng night, i did manage to sleep around 5ish hours :) but food was low… i wanted to move.

the waterfall and navigation arguments … arrrgggg! We thankfully head up the left of the waterfall, its cool (with enough reasoning, we make the right choice. Our group is quiet, theres no talking or listening, no joking… no fun… just follow.

Then through the easy flowing Alpine, a descent and into a nestled Mountain Lodge (a helicopter fly in heli-skiing vacation getaway) Snuggly situated at what seemed like the gate into the VALHALLAS …~/warm, cozy feeling of sheer gRANDness.. i LOVE and FEar the MountAins...

.'i would double check your location?' ..the sweet lodge lady tells us before we take off from our checkpoint. 'If you're bushwhacking out of here, you're going the wrong way'. ..fair enough :) 'thank you, and for the yumMy soup'.

..WE HEad off…. bushwhacking into the wrong direction. 'T3.. if we're bushwhacking we're heading the wrong direction??.. STOP, we're going the wrong way.' theres no reasoning with T3. 'NO juDE you're wrong, thats when we hit the alpine, there

should be no bushwhacking..' (really…duh!, what alpine region has bush, are you kiddin' me?) So a battle begins.. its T1 & Tm vs. T2 & T3.. we lose, as T2 fears that T3 will crack and blow up at us all, she convinces us to go with it.. i had my hackles up, being my overly sassy-self, i was seriously questioning T3's skills and well of course, Egos got mixed in and logic lost… 'JUST SHUT UP AND FOLLOW!'… was what i was told, where the Teamwork in that?..

(By this point i was angry, i was feeling belittled my the age in my company (as if apparently age yield experience..so NOT), i was disrespected (looked at as the child), ignored.. at times i felt like i was jumping up and down, screaming 'HEY GUYS, WHAT ABOUT THIS? LOOK.' T1 listened, she took me seriously, didn't judge me and understood that i had a vast pool of Mountain traversing experience and leadership skills, the others couldn't see beyond my 28 years, they had 13 years on me.. what did i know that they didn't? Tempers were high and fur was flying as we continued in the wrong direction.

.....

PART ONE - Raid the NOrth eXTREMe - an uNFolding

2011-08-01T14:50:00.000-07:00

MAny a strange things can happen when a 100+ individuals are thrown into an unknown, wild setting getting to travel only my their very own power, grit and willingness to push, a race against time in light and through the night. So nATurally every ones story will be wilDLy different..

Mine will begin the morning of race start ..
… im riding my bEAUt 'the GOld Kona kUla' a responsive, soLIDly light cross-country hardtail. The Ocean is to my right, the beach begins to pebble. im having difficulties keeping solid balance. My eyes begin to water from the outside elements. The pebbles start turning into larger rocks becoming randomly placed talus. .The water is pulsating faster, my eyes are blurring, my vision is fading. I fall off my bicycle and get back on, continue to ride, i keep falling off and i continue to get back on, relentlessly moving forward. My vision is getting worst, i can barely make out the boulders, i cant look at the ocean, i need to focus, keep the body moving but theres so much resistance, so much out of my control. but then, the thinking just stops and there's only reacting. .. . ~ … a FAst snapshot of memories past.. a panic, a huge impact ...pULse of energy to the heart.. . .. .. … . … . .. .. … .. … .. …
. . . .. .. .. .. …. i scream to the conscious world .. … 'iM ALIVe!'. .. .. . .. .. . .. .. .

As my teamate shakes me awake in alert, i realize that im in the comfort of my DOwn sleeping sack, laying in the team tent.
Morning begins with a relentless 4hour uphill grind with our bicycles. WE're consistent giving a solid-ish effort being that two of our team were increasingly weaker on the uphill riding, nonetheless we all arrived in great time and in spirit with huge GRins on our faces. 'WAhoOO!' one CP down 21 more to go. We drop bikes and get off on a LOng 20+hour something, devils CLub bushWACking nightmare. I begin to feel a breakdown in Leadership due to the increasing confusion of personal responsibility.
… the bushwhack, was nasty mean, relentless however eventually transforming into an alpine meadow, an open dry forest, thickening in plant Life, this was only the intro to the beloved Devils Club and low angled side-hill growing ALder. From here, navigation really began and skills were tested as there are no established trails just terrain and topos. Our day progresses well but as night falls, we drop the scent and begin one of many (short lived) wrong turns. WE come to a river crossing 'no big, its cool.' yah, really cold that is, it spans maybe 10ft across and is solid, boulder-free thigh high quick running water. Our man (being the largest in size) leading, followed my the three small gals on the team, holding onto one another packs pushing through the stream force. WE're good, our guy starts yelling, i feel the panic in his voice, he's extremely uncomfortable. I start to wonder who's leading this team, who has the qualities to hold us together. We get across all shaken by the shock of cold and deciding it best, we quickly get moving into an all night wet log, ground covered, chest high Devils Club , skin burning navigational nightmare. There are so many creeks, so many wet slick logs, but like WAriors we push strongly through.

Im the first to get hit with the sleep monster, its nearly 4am, my eyes uncontrollably close as i stubble through wet ground and tricky body movements weaving in and out of thick brush. what to do??.. ingest something with caffeine, 'PErfect' my alertness sharpens, i begin to FOcus on the teams movement. A bEAutiful light begins to form, dawn has arrived. The teams energy brightens. Having just crossed this incredibly thick valley we start to ascend up the mountain through low laying Alder Mangrove. Our next checkpoint, a pass through gorgeous snow peaked alpine, CP2…. huge talus shoot, im moving quite comfortably, im thinking all but one are strong, and we're catering to them, allowing them to feed off of their weakness (big mistake, theres no tolerance for the wine, we all have it we should just sucK-it-up.. unless *special life-threatened case, lets quickly find the issue creating the outcome and fix it or move on) .. mental blur…into the bowl and off we go again, following snow tracks from leading teams down to maintained single track… gravel access road to CP3, warm dehydrated meal and the first soaking wet 35minute sleep.

Lets make like bananas and SPlit…. up a gruelling 7mile hill on our bikes, it begins to rain hard, how demoralizing, we're all feeling chilled and slightly irritable.. we get to the top and decide the most obvious ride off this peak is surely the wrong way.. it can't be this straight forward, so against 'the navigators' best judgement we descend a rocky, potholed old service road down to the ghost town of Cody.. . .. my bREAkdown happens…
*to simplify the thought, ive shortened the names of my teamates and me down to Tm-me, T1,T2,T3
.. backing this up a day.. T1 and TM are leisurely cranking the Grannygear , when T1 stops me in my tracks and points out a large (9inch-ish) belly up frog a foot in front of my wheel, i tell her of this random recollection in my thought process..
*A WEst Coast legend states that the frog is a messenger of Death to follow. The tale has proved to be true in my experience (the last time i had met a frog was in COsta Rica, a small frog had jumped across my dinner plate at the end of a stage (at the TCC staged ultramarathon challenge, which happens every January), the frog paused and disappeared. During the next days staged, i ran along a beach, far in the vast tide line there was a large mammal with half-a-dozen vultures circling and picking at i, death had come.)

SO back to the top of the obvious service road... the rain thickens, the clouds engulfs the mountain, dusk faded to its last leg.. i turn my headlamp on and began the descent down the gravel road.. 'i can't ...oh WOw.. can't see and the road is a scattered stream of dirt and fist-sized scree, potholes thrown me off balance... I CANT SEE'. ..i stop, walk my bicycle down the switchback trail, i want to run behind my teammates as they seem to be in more control over the elements. I want to run, i run and i can simply feel, react to my situation. I'm GREat on my feet, my body knows its movement and balance points however my team refuses to ride alongside my stride and begin to move off their bikes with me. im miserable, the grounds rocky, the fog and the torrential rain pounds on my frozen soaked layers and layers of clothing. .. a couple of small frogs cross my path and disappear.

Im completely silent, a battle of mind begins. Im torn at the thought of this race. Why push myself into suffering, was this necessary, were these frogs a warning sign, a prediction to come.. and my dream, the relation, the coincidence?. i was feeling panicked , my thoughts were seeing the worst case scenario, i wanted to stop, prevent this all to happen, the warning was clear... make the right choices or quit, i wanted to quit. I let my team on, T1 wanted to throw up at the idea, so T2 decided once we hit the second ghost town of Sandon that we should bed down, warm up and feed (a very strong, solid decision, biG KUdos T2). We then see an old shed all boarded up and start to look for a way in. All of a sudden theres lights in a small cabin next door.

T2 talks with a Man then guides us to his home. His Lady and himself insist we come in and warm up. its 12am, we remove our wet clothes, dry them by an old wood burning stove and heartily thank the older couple for their hospitality. They begin to share some of the history of Sandon with us, their home is filled with old energy of thick history. The woman points out that this structure was that of a hospital that formed after the fall of the rich, mining city of Sandon. It was built in the mid 1940's for what the town had now become, a Japanese Interment camp (a dark stone in our CAnadian history). T1 inquires of ghosts, the woman quickly flushed goes on to make us hot cocoa 'would you like a marshmallow for you cocoa? ive baked these sweet yams muffins for dinner, please go ahead, eat.' we bed down for our first incredibly good sleep... 3hours later, we wake, eat and take off riding uphill into dawn.... a magical spot in the midst of an utter character breakdown. I still wonder if i dreamt that up, although my teamates swear they saw it too?.
...
. .. ...

Raid The NOrth eXTReme.

2011-07-20T08:31:00.000-07:00

… stressed out thoughts, 8 days to go.
500km, 6 dAYs.. EPic SIngletrack mountain biking, trekking and canoe paddling… am i nervous?…uh… call me crazy but.. heck yEAH! im nervous, scared, excited. WE're racing in a Team of four, three gals and one guy, that means we stay together, race together, support one another and we all have to cross that finish line together. You may think that we know each other well but its quite the opposite, i'll be spending more time with my teamates this next week then i ever have… and that makes me nervous. i don't know what sets them off or cheers them up, im unaware how to help motivate them or how each reacts under stress. Do you think that matters? .. i do. WE're all sort of going in with the mentality of each of us on our own, fighting this mental battle alone in our heads, instead of the all-for-one and one-for-all attitude. Do i think this will disadvantage us?.. not nesccesarily but possibly. I believe if we're all strongly, individually motivated and solid on our reasons for competing and finishing, we'll be able to help each other pull through everything and anything. WE all have our strengths on the team and we'll all need to be compassionate to our weaknesses, which could be the problem since we all have very strong and stubborn personalities.

Then there's the issue of gear. To start, we're all racing with different bikes (3 on full suspension and me on a race xc hardtail), which means different functions, strength in type of terrain, components (not to mention, very different riding abilities). We have different packs, lighting systems, hydration, clothing. The advantage is that we all have what we believe works best for us individually, disadvantage is that we all have slightly different loads and capabilities so we'll need to find middle ground and its true what they say about.. 'you're only as fast as your slowest', can we all be understanding and compassionate to the slowest.? Will we have and show the patience?.

Then there's our fuel, being planned in pairs rather then a team of four… this could work.. but will it? Each eating different things, each consuming different amounts of fuel, different ratios of carbs, proteins and vitamins. Each recovering at different rates. It's all really very amateurally organized, we cant predict our results because its all variables, nothing is really controlled or constant… and again i say… heCK YEAH! i mean thats ADVENTURE RACING, right? WE want an adventure, an experience … an EPic journey, hahaa aha and thats exactly what we'll get.

… stress working itself out, 4 days to go.
I'll be honest, i won't lie, I AM HUMAN. After a week long battle of mini emotional stress breakdowns, i lost it completely, ready to completely thrown myself off a bridge to avoid dealing with any more stress. I had overbooked myself. Between RTNE, other races, coordinating festivals, work, family, finances and personal life… i was done, there (and somewhat still is) was no room left in me. All my compartments were filled and spilling into one another, i had it, i wanted to close my eyes and wait for it to all be over. It wasn't good to feel this way, it wasn't ideal or healthy, i needed help to work my thoughts out. I needed someone to help me put everything into perspective. So i did what is incredibly difficult for me and reached out, asked for help.
(asking for help scares me, it makes me feel weakened, it makes me feel worthless, incapable… which is sooOO off. ASking for help is the bravest act i could ever do, don't get me wrong, i ask for help all the time in the everyday life, when it concerns work, family or others but the deep rooted stuff, the help that exposes cracks in my character im incapable of freely sharing, i don't like showing weakness, i fear weakness as if my survival depended on it.)
.. so i did what i dreaded and reached out, and i received some of the best help and advice i could have asked for. No longer today do i feel frozen waiting to explode, waiting for the world to rotate without me.

i had an epiphany… An expedition Style Race has been a long time dream of mine… A HUGE DREAM. One day, i was going to race one of these CRAzy things. So why am i stressing out about every little detail, trying to control all these uncontrollable variables. I have ME, my fighting SPirit, my HEart, my GRIT.. everything else is trivial, details to be organized but not to suck me dry of energy, i needed to widen my perspective. So in four days time my dream is coming true, how WICKed is that? I'll be racing a cRAzy expedition, 500km race, completely self-navigated, a trudge of survival. AM I ready? who knows, but what i do know is that i get to share this Dream directly with three other incredible individual. Each having at one point been in the same nervous Newbie shoes as me, each understanding and supportive of my drive and my contributions. I am so eXCITed to set off on this journey…
….. a beginning to no end of a lifetime of dANGErous oppORTunities.

the complicATion of individuality.

2011-07-07T00:10:00.000-07:00

i missed a hUGe story in my last post.. the joURney.
my foCUs is tOo broad
i am missing a raCe that feels strangely very close to my heart. for many reasons, i decide not too race. Oh sweet SINISTER.. how i will miss your seVEn legs.
i feel teased with the promise of sharper eyes, stronger bones, new memories
this Year i wanted a new adventure,
i wanted the CRowsnest to understand me, to nurture me.
i had nEW ideas and smoother form.
my duCks just couldn't walk in a row.
... nonetheless ...
i loVE the Endurance sports. (it's a loVE/HAte thanig really.!)
there's a patience and excitement that allows larGEr aDVentures to develop,
to aggressively teach Life lessons in compressed challenging foRm.

scorched sOLe & bUrning hEarts.-

2011-07-04T21:13:00.000-07:00

i write to express myself, i write to figure out what i think about.. .... . . . . . . . . . .... . ... . .. . . .. ..
... i write to remember and recall events that so easily get lost in my memory.. i write because i most often feel CRazy and trapped in this conformed WOrld .

sO how was scorched sole? .. .HOt.! but in more then just tempature.. it was Dry, it was lonesome. Open mountain sides of diRt, rocks and exhausted plant life. There was very little fresh oxygen flowing around but rather Life in the air of the people.. the racers, volunteers and general community of the lake side Okanagan town of Kelowna.

The course was incredibly difficult. WE climb endlessly from gradual to steep hill sides for the first 40+kms. At, lucky times we'd get a smooth flowing single track which was inCREDibly runnable with my eyes closed (the meadow to Commando) However, the general trend was... grueling uphill which seem to never quit. It took, in GAry Robbins words, a heck of a lot of 'RElentless FOrward mOMentum' to push 6.5hrs of undulating mostly uphill dry terrain. By the time i reached the 40km checkpoint i was boinked, out of juice.heheee... then the secret weapon :) i had stashed in my drop bag a large can of Coconut water... and wOW, did all those electrolytes ever revive me. At that point, a volunteer told me a few racers before me had decided to drop to the 50km, i'll admit (a natural human reaction) i felt somewhat perhaps tempted... however, i managed to talk myself into more suffering (really.. serious.. why am i doing this? frikin' BULL, stubborn, a finely tuned Taurean trait i believe.. if used correctly) i had set out to run the 50miles that day, i needed to prove to myself that i wASn't an ultraRunning masquerader. AM i strong? CAn i do this? CAn i really run 80km and stay solid to the finish? .. i needed to find that out.
.. and i did
. i took 1st in the Women's field and 4th overall, which feels pretty goOD.. really, simply that i finished was a hUGE accomplishment in itself, that course was gruelling.. :) thanks DAn, i very much enjoyed the challenge.
. ... it was so beautiful out there, i recall running down to Commando Bay (twice, had to drop huge elevation down to an aid station/checkpoint, the 50mile course was an Out&Back, so the Commando Bay was repeated. On the huge +, for accessibility reasons (i believe) the station was well stocked with loads of yummy food and the Pretty lady volunteers were such a welcomed cheer squad to me and the other racers.. they were incredibly spirited. *i've said it before, i'll say it again.. the people (racers, organizers, volunteers and community) have everything to do with a Great race, the environment and spirit created at these events is really what makes or breaks a Race. ... okay, shinny medals and prizes are awesome too..
. lol..okay, i'm on a rant...
...i loVE medals. i never won medals as a kid.. i wasn't tall enough, fast enough or even coordinated enough to play sports.. although i did get a few shinny plaques for spirit awards and Woodworking (and also art) excellence.. i was chubby, awkward, muscular and free-spirited. ... so what do i look for in a good race... a good shinny something :)) ... COAch SEGGER called it real early on... 'juDE..you're going to be a shinny buckle collector, i see it :) ... heheheeee ..yES, yes i AM.. super stoked for Wasatch100 and PineToPalm100 coming this fall.
..

the heart of the ULtra.

the journey of suffering
the athlete, the artist, the intellect, the savvy.

This past weekend was a goOD test. I felt the hurt, felt joy, contemplation, serenity, frustration, anger, freedom. bliss… all of which are good feelings to feel, it sort of helps me to further understand that of which i feel and too often question.

maMAn.

2011-07-01T13:31:00.000-07:00

today i saw a picture of you... its been two years. i miss you dearly. we have not spoken, you refuse to know me. a few things you missed along the years. .. i am a runner, i inspire.. and i am broken inside.. i search for pain and suffering because i search for home. if i can find the bulk of the suffering perhaps i can take it away from another... you have built me this way.. this you do not know or fail to understand. i love the idea of you, you gave me Life. ..just wish i could hug you, that i could easily love you. Maman je t'aime encore.

Life in a flash..

2011-06-25T00:46:00.001-07:00

wHAts been happening... the fast version.

biTS And pieCEs.

2011-06-20T01:32:00.000-07:00

a happy moment?..
a connection. …a sMILe. an interaction between tWO stories. aSK Me .. .WHo, whAt..wheRe is your favourite.? .. i shall not tell.. i haVE No favourites.

i go through phases like these.. where i let so many adventures happen and put off writing about them that i forget.

'Nootka - a 50km-ish trail on the most remote west coast terrain, bordering ocean from here to Japan. Along with three aWEsome friends and Zipper (the dog) we journeyed on a five day trek along WEst Coast finest spots. WE flew in, you have to unless you spend days paddling in (we didn't have the time :(..) trkeked ocean shelves at low tides and lost ourselves bushwacking at high. WE learned of the lands Native legends (the wolf and the whale) ..as well a little of the lands dark history. it was a real special type of adventure.
MOMAR - my veRY First (and shortest - 50km) aDVEnture race... very cool. WE made it in dead chicken last and it was quite an aDVEnture (wHat didnt go sideways.. lol)… I was racing partnered with the 'Killer' JEn Joliffe, a good friend from my two previous Coastal Challenges. Ii was the best/coolest intro into the adveture race world i could have asked for (and the after PArty was true to its reputation :) i am completely in the mood for a test… RTNE bring it on… im eXCited.!.
Olympics - i hate bUShwaCKing!!! ..yuk. oh ..and no sleep 41hrs. a lot of paddling and night trekking..snow high passes, sausage and croissants.. and coconut/cherry oatmeal in a ziplock.. yUM... really!'

Lets start at zero again. … Today. Im feeling physically athletic. Strong all around, able to jump into everything at a moderately good level. My flexibility is poor and my muscles are strong and often tight. Im not in the same running shape as i was 4.5 months ago, ive become slower in the run (due to lack of practice) however more confident on the mountain xc bike and the paddle. i am terribly missing my ruNNer self… so, im thinking im going to tip the scales and move towards more running again :)
.. … sO.. a gaL i know (heARt of goLD) had this craZy idea of running a 100 mile Race. 'eh juDE.. you do that right.?' ..sO of course i say 'yAH.. eh wanna race one together.?' gAL..'okay, but its gonna be soon, i have a short attention span.. eh. wanna riDE Our bikes.?'..juDE.'.mE TOo :) .ah..okay, theres one called PINE TO PALM 100, its in Oregon in September.. looks pretty :)'
… and that is how this Adventure will go down. I'll rUN my first Official 100mile race WASATCH 100 then the following weekend i will be running a wicked adventure with my dear NEw uLTrarunning TWin in the PINE TO PALM 100… 200miles.. one week, plus my training recovery runs :). im very excited… ive grown this foND LOVe of belt buckles this past year. sO.. five more weeks of gnarly Adventuring, Raid the North Extreme then one week recovery and onto ENdurance rUN training once again :)

*did i mentioned... im in loVE :)

passing by..

2011-06-17T22:59:00.000-07:00

where is my pEN and why am i trapped in this mental mind cartridge... i want to write, i want to tell the world of my man,y MANY MAy Adventures, June Adventures... but i forgot.. most.. trying to slowly recall.. im lost for words.

MAndatory Equipment EpisODe #2

2011-06-15T20:29:00.000-07:00

okAY episode #2... an unusually rare ADVenture race team...

iNSpiratiOn.

2011-05-18T22:51:00.000-07:00

Why do we do the things we do, why do we choose the Life we live? Its the greatest feeling to understand that if we can find that one thing (or in some cases the many) that we can truely enjoy and love, the one thing that challenges us, that breaks us down and builds us up, that helps us find purpose, the one thing we feel we need to share with others because if others can enjoy it the way we do or if it simply helps them find the thing that moves them in the same way... we know, that everything around us will somehow be better, be richer. Whats Life without love, whats Life without that incredible feeling of being ALive.
... i think this bEAutifully spirited woman captured the feeling quite well with this short filmed snapshot into her personal experience.
.enjoy

Elk/BEaver… a miLE MArker.

2011-05-10T10:33:00.000-07:00

wahoO.. finally a race. A test. I haven't tested myself since COsta Rica and i was excited to find out how i was going to perform under pressure. Overly excited, my usual FLuffy BUnny self.. "GOod Morning, its going to be a gorgeous day, rain or shine… isn't this aWESome… yah, yah.. lets run.. wooHOo, la la LA LAla la la..". I knew conditions were less then ideal ( i was feeling slightly yuk), hey but something is always a little off.. right.?! For the most part, I was ecstatic, thrilled ready to put in a top effort.

The sun is just beginning to rise, the air is warm and it's drizzling on & off. Im dress perfectly and comfortably. I have my Salomon speedcross on, paired with a new pair of compressport calves, which im stoked to race in for the first time. Already they feel much more comfortable then any other compression calve i've tried in the past (Skins, CEP and Sugoi). My muscles are warm from running across the dewy lawn multiple times. My belly is deliciously full of chia seeds and hemp hearts (my usual long run premeal) and my pockets are filled with chocolate Lindt Balls (my favourite quick fuel). I have on a small 1.5 Litre camalback, it's light and short and doesn't at all bug my back or restrict my running form. All and all, im feeling good, im ready and im eager to run.

So… race starts and as per usual i find that the biggest hole in the start line is in front of me, a few shy starters i guess, thats fine, i'll take one for the team. SO off we go and i start out comfortably fast, i run the first 5km at a 4:30min/km pace… okay, perhaps a little quick but i train to run a 5-5:30 pace for hours in my Tempo workouts so i figure im doing alright…. umm, not so much, within 5km i start to fall down to a 5min/km pace, but somethings not right.. im getting trail Vertigo, the path is shifting, moving and twisting… yiKEs my equilibrium is completely off, im being thrown completely off balance then my body begins to numb, my hands and arms are swelling, and tingling…"oh no, i bet this is the cough syrups doing (i had developed a really coarse cough over the past day that was making me almost throw up overtime i opened my mouth).. but it was non-drowsy… what gives?".

SO i talk my way through the first 10km lap… "It's oKAy jude, lap 2 will feel much better, just give your body time to warm up, this will all work itself out". Into the aid station… "woohoo Jude, how you doing?", my sweet race crew (friends cheering me on) ask. "yah, ok.. good, im just gonna keep ok" but really inside i was doing all i could not to collapse to the ground, where was the ground anyways?". I knew then that this race was going to be a struggle, but if i didn't admit it to myself i knew i would have an easier time with it. LAp 2 was no better, although much of the Vertigo had disappeared, my second lap was spent convincing my mind to stay strong, this was after all.. only 50km, an easyish distance… today i was going to race it, run it hard however my focus quickly shifted to "today im going to finish". By the end of Lap 2 i was down to a slow 6min/km pace…"arrrgg.. this is no good, im going to slow to keep up my efficient pace, im putting out way too much energy moving.

Back at the aid station, 20km down… "jude, you're doing aWESome, how you feeling?"… this time being slightly more honest with myself, i point out to my good friend that my back is flaring up and im struggling to stay upright, im sweating like a crazy woman (although im freezing, my hands are ice) and my heartrate is through the roof. She rubs my back quickly, refills my bladder with CarboPro and electrolytes and sends me off for my next 10km. All i can think about is how this must get better, it always does, just endure, you'll see, in another 5km i'll be back to the game and feeling great. Wrong again… im getting worst, my gut is cramping, fluids are resurfacing… WTF.. im 28km in, WHAT IS GOing on!?!

In the back of my head, I knew this race was going to be tough as i was still recovering from a back injury and my mileage had been inconsistent and unusually low. 2 more Laps, i had to keep it together only for 2 more LAps. I finish the 3rd loop, trying to smile. Smile at the volunteers, smile at the RD, be my pleasant self but tears were uncontrollably pumping out of my eyes. I felt like i had been axed in the back repetitively and was doing everything in my power not to completely collapse from the pain throbbing, stabbing my lower back. 2 more laps, that's it, just suck it up… please, just suck it up, its a test, a test to see if i've got what it takes for the hard time, the uncomfortable times. So, I walk out of the aid station and continue onto my 4th lap.

Within 200 metres, i get back into a small trot… "just keep running, you can do this, you're built to endure pain, just push". and then logic kicks in… what if today isn't the day to push… what are my next few months priorities? Raid the North Extreme.. thats the real TEST day, thats the event to push through, why am i pushing so hard? If i quit, does that make me weak… does that make me incapable? What if i really hurt myself and my training keeps suffering… WHAt if, this has to do with the cold/flu thats hit me again and my nodes are all flared up and what if im not weak? just sick. Okay, decision made, suck up my Pride… im not a quitter however today is not my day… my 9th ultra and my first %100 my decision drop-out… and I AM OKAY with that.

I turn around, walk back to the start and officially drop. My mental is still in high spirits, my body is broken. Turns out, i had a WICKED good time. I hung around the start/finish line cheering on the runners and spent the afternoon chitchatting it up with the legends of UltraMarathoning, Moe the Eagle Beaulieu and Rob Grant. I listen to all their trail tales, runner gossip (no, not really, no gossip, but really these two knew every ultrarunner since the 80's) and took in all their advice on running 100milers (as i'll be running my first one in September). It was such an honour to be bullshitting with these two Ultramarathoning Legends… i couldn't help but feel completely satisfied with the choice i made that day, after all, in the end everything seems to always work itself out.

*a little blurp on Elk/Beaver. Situated on Vancouver Island, just outside of Victoria, a short ferry ride from the mainland. Elk/Beaver is ran as a 50km, 50miles or 100km. The Course is a 10km loop. Its mostly flat dirt paths that weave through gorgeous big Cedar trees (and other, but Cedars are my favourite), you run around the two lakes. It s an awesome course to learn to pace yourself on and run with quick, consistent leg turn over. I'll admit when i ran this race last year, my attitude was off… i wanted the mountains, i wanted hills. However, theres a real beauty to this course, its different, its flat (which can be hugely challenging in long distances as you never really get that variety of movement) and im a fan. This race is growing into a Yearly must-do, it fits into a training year aWEsome as it trains that flat leg-turnover early in the season.

huge Kudos to all the runners, especially Brad and Suzanne for a wicked 100km race and Rob Thompson for completing his first UltraMarathon (50mile) in a wicked strong time.. oh and wOW.. you should have all seen speedy Jason run an INCREDIBLY FAST 100km... wOW.. it was a flashback of last years' unbelievable performance by Ellie Greenwood.
And big thanks to my crew WEsty Friends, all the dedicated volunteers and Carlos for putting on another great event... till next Year.

MAndatory EQuipment - Episode #1

2011-04-29T18:10:00.000-07:00

yAH... its here, episode numero UNo. Follow Me and my aWEsome three teamates (DEb, Michelle and ERik) get ready for the ADventure of a lifetime.... follow our training all the way to the most EPIc race ever... RAID THE NORTH EXTREME. The race happens late July 2011, so who knows what will be from now till then... but im SToked!

check it out HERE... EPisode #ONe enjoy.

a randOM UPdate... reflections of a non-running RUnner

2011-04-25T18:31:00.000-07:00

(Lake Sasamat, the start and finish of the DiezVista50)

With lower volume of running these days ... I've realized just how much fire i have within, and hOW much i miss my runner-self. hmmm.. interesting. I hear often comments like... you run how long.? how far.? -'that's crazy, i would never do that'. .. and i say.. you already do, you do in that one thing you've chosen to excel at, whatever that might be, you try harder then others, you dedicate yourself, your time, your practice, you push the limits, you do what others wont.
okay, so thinking of my races and Life.
. .. Its interesting, Race day is like 'test' day. i find that when i race, i push myself hard, i test myself..and when i push myself, I'm REal, more alive then ever, foCUsed.. i don't always like pushing myself, but i know it makes me stronger, it helps me develop skills, mental skills for future use. On the other hand its given me an outlet of self-expression, a way to connect with others and to share through a skill, a passion not only for running but for Life, for the mountains, for its people... for the evolution of geAR (ohhhh.. hoW i loVE bEAUtifully functional gear)
..but no, no don't get me wrong.. running is not all PEAches & Pie.. but thats what makes it invaluable. EAch race, for me, is an aNNOying rollercoaster of emotions. However, with each emotion i feel, in that moment, good and bad.. i experience something. .. think of it as mini-lessons, each race like a movie... there's a protagonist, an antagonist, a problem, a challenge, euphoric moments of complete release and acceptance, many pessimistic self-jabs, a climax then a finish, topped with a lesson and valuable experience...
. ..i don't enjoy every moment but i enjoy the process and i loVE the journey. . i look forward to the feeling of accomplishment i get only from knowing i gave it my all, i pushed through when i wanted to quit, i believed in myself and tore down self-limiting barriers that were slowly built through my Lifetime of experience. SOmehow with every race i run and every adventure i journey, i feel i become a better, stronger person. I learn to cope, to interact, to achieve, to fail and to fall, to accept and to give. Its interesting, i believe we learn greater lessons from challenges and hardship, so in a way perhaps that's why I'm choosing to excel at this endurance thing, I'm not sure its just about the running... i feel its more about the fight, the fight to survive and push limits, to push beyond where others have capped their capabilities.
i seek to see possibilities in every obstacles, an opportunity to enrich life.. mine and others.
But ... enough with the reflecting.

This past month has been hectic... full of events and adventures. The DiezVista 50 came and went... my first planned 50km (besides the Coastal Challenge), unfortunately, a few days before the race i really pulled something big in my back so i hesitantly chose not to run. I did however still attend the race, supported my peeps and had a blast chatting it up with the race community. Congrats to all who did run as the course had been rerouted this year to the upper lake trail which added loads of elevation and difficulty.

left - (the roCKStar JEn Jolliffe, who ran both 230km Coastal Challenges with me and seems to always get the #69 lol)

NExt, the following weekend which was the annual Vancouver SunRun 10km, one of the largest 10km road races in North America, with this years attendance being nearly 51 000. This race i did run, i hate to say it but i felt like i ran against my will....lol. Okay, so i don't do well in crowds, i get nervous, i get anxious however my work puts together a Team every year and i was given a lot of grief for not running last year...'but i don't like road... and i don't like elbowing crowds, arrgg'..
However, in the support of active living and exercising i believed i needed to show my support to the cause and join in the dreaded road run... i ended up having loads of fun and i even ran another 6km or so home, the energy was fantastic, the people having fun, and i ended up running a 44min 10.8km (hahah, my watch clocked an extra 0.8km, i believe from all the weaving through he crowds), which doesn't sounds very impressive but it was for me. I was still recovering from the back injury and i hadn't done any serious training (just fun, easy runs) since racing in COstaRica nearly 2.5 months before.

right- (two of the biggest hearts around Chris Barth and Tiger, both ran a strong DiezVista and a pleasure to share the day with)

So, next up on the schedule is Elk/Beaver. The 50mile distance was the plan, as i ran last year, however being honest with myself, i believe the distance would hurt me more then necessary. Still not quite healed up from the back strain and having a much smaller base mileage then anticipated, I'm having to rethink this year's race strategy.... i miss my coach (she's awfully busy and lives a few hours away, unfortunately, I'm in need of one-on-one training and that's simply not in the books :( ) So... I'm thinking I'm going to run a smaller race, the 50km and push. I'm honestly feeling way under-trained, but none the matter, things are the way they are and i still have my drive, my passion... so 50km, here i come, i will run my heart out and give it my all.

above - (JEn and i's Racing WEstys... ready to Party it up..lol.. or sleep)

wisE WOrds from Josh Wheeler

2011-04-15T10:56:00.000-07:00

In my current recovery state, i came across this awesome article (in the LaSportiva 2011 catalogue) by Josh Wheeler. Wise words from a great Athlete... although i disagree with his warm-up in the rain with a down jacket... unless that down jacket has a wicked DWR coating, i'd keep it out of the rain as down clumps and losses its insulating qualities when wet... There's a strong reason why all of us 'Vancouverites' wear Gore-tex everything... plus now days you can easily pick up a 300g 3-layer prolite Gore shell, my personal favorite the Arc'teryx Alpha SL Jacket. So listen well, this Josh fellow is onto something and throw a rain shell over your down...woh.. wait a sec... this guy is in his early twenties.. crazy.. cool.

The DO's and Dont's of Running for a PR.
by Josh Wheeler

I started ultra-running when i was 12 years old, running my first marathon on my thirtieth birthday. The earliest memories of long runs were starting under headlamp, running for six hours, fuelled entirely on Honey-Nut Cheerios and Capri Sun. I have experimented across all training philosophies and nutritional strategies only to find that the greatest strategy is to learn how to listen to your body.

10. Don't look back.Formulate a race strategy before the gun but be flexible as the conditions of the start line often differ from the ideal. Run without fear or hesitation. Find your running partners, size up the competition, take a deep breath and go for it. If you are racing for the finish or running for a placing at the finish, when you make the leap to run for guts and glory, stick with the decision.

9. Run in the moment. Find that sense of flow where everything blurs and the run becomes effortless. Take stock of your surroundings. Become in tune with your body, feel your heartbeat, measure your breathing, watch your fuel intake and finally, relax. The best performances come when the pressure to perform is left at the start line and all you have to do is enjoy.

8. Don't hurdle course markings. Keep your head up. In your haste to become one with the run, don't get to caught up in the moment that you run down the wrong trail or in my case start hurdling race flagging, blazing down the trail wondering, "who in their right mind would put a barrier across the trail?".

7. EAT! I am going to go a little non-traditional on the nutritional advice because we are ultra-runners and probably have heard it all. As such we are crazy enough to run 100 miles but not crazy enough to eat only Gu's for 100 miles. So eat up. Eat your Oreo's, gummy bears, M&M's! Otherwise the race director is just going to go home with a truckload of animal crackers. By eating at the aid station not only are you guaranteed a terrific stomachache but you're also saving future racers from having to eat one-year old peanut-butter filled pretzels.

6. Don't get hypothermic during the warm-up. The warm-up is supposed to be a WARM-up. If it is 38 degrees and pouring rain, the best warm-up is a light jog to the port-o-let in a down jacket and back. Unless you are a milage hog, keep the warm-up minimal. Don't run the entire course for your warm-up.

5. Bring Body Glide. And Duct tape. And flip flops. And clean socks.

4. Don't forget to EAT. Starting to see a pattern? Running ultra-marathons is 20% running and 80% nutrition. You should enter into your next ultra with the mindset of treating the race as a running buffet. Eat continuously and often because you never know what lies between you and the next aid station. Better to end with some extra fuel in the tank then to run empty and have to coast into the finish. There's nothing worst then being 8 miles from an aid station, having a six mile climb and having to resort to the hypoglycaemic death waddle while hallucinating that you are seeing large blueberries on the trail (hypothetically speaking, of course). Practice what you preach and experiment with a wide range of food sources because some of the best nutritional surprises come in an act of training experimentation (see dark chocolate coffee beans, almond butter SunChips). Remember, "if the fire is hot enough, anything will burn."

3. Leave the watch at home. If you are bound by the temptation of time, consider leaving the watch on the nightstand for your next recovery run. Trail running is so versatile and the terrain is so highly varied that running with a watch only sets you up for limitations. To run free without limits, the watch is best to remain in the bag with the Body Glide. And duct tape, And flip flops. And the clean socks. Learn to run on feel and i promise that not only will the experience have a more lasting impact but you will find that you become more in tune with what your body needs both nutritionally and physically. The pace will become natural.

2. Don't be scared of running on the road. Ah, the dreaded four-letter word for trail runners. Questions like "is asphalt softer then concrete?" and "will following this white line lead anywhere?" are irrelevant. There are advantages on the road, like running to a trailhead.

1. Remember to enjoy. I know the journey can get rocky (if you are from North Carolina) or rooty (if you are from the south) or steep (if you are from Colorado) but trail running is the great escape. It brings together people with a passion for being outdoors and running through some remarkable scenery. So in the pursuit of your next PR, remember to look up once in a while and take stock in the fact that you have a gift to run. In the words of Steve Prefontaine, "To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift."

StumpJump 50k: Josh Wheeler from Rock/Creek on Vimeo.

to RAce oR NOt to race... the runners dilemma.

2011-04-07T21:47:00.000-07:00

good news. bad news.
GOod news, im out paddling, which is great as im less then FOur months away from the most EPic aDVenture oF MY LIFE. [stay tuned as the adventure unfolds...] BAd news, im out.. in my lower back. Physio today, still too inflamed to tell, either a bad strain or a slipped something ruther.., good treatment, seems to have helped, back in tomorrow for another treatment and then the following day, my first 50km race of the sEASon : ).? ..hmmmm, i wonder if theres a wrong choice here... so gut says - RUn, you've suffered worst.. brain says - while evaluating the evidence of both sides it is apparent that this is not an 'A' race, therefore you have two choices. #1- walk it (however.. that'd be twice the time upright compressing down, so.. id still be better off running the 50) #2- dont RUn it.... hmmmmm. That's not even the point.. 'A' race or not, i loVE that course. The RAce is the DiezVista 50, it runs around two beautiful lakes and two ridges, one being the imposing DiezVista, named for its 10 lookout views into the Indian Arm. Its also one of the BEst (hidden) ULtras in the Vancouver area. Also... ive paid for my race entry and i hate throwing away money : ) but are these reasons to posiibly delay my lower back recovery resulting in longer term recovery..... yikes.
okay, bottom line is this... ive never hurt my back like this, its fresh and racing a 50km trail run would really slow down my recovery which would make my training for RTNE suffer.... baaaaaa.. what if im just being dramatic, id never know... honestly, thats probably one of the best things about having a mate, they help keep you in Line (well..the good Ones), they tell you when youre being unreasonable (suck it up and push through) and also when its best to simply back down. ..i miss that, wheres my other half advising me whats best to do.? Strange how times like this make us feel most alone. Should i rUN or should i NOt.?.

oNTo the next.. .

2011-03-31T23:51:00.000-07:00

heELLo NB.. . a very well done snapshot into a truely minimalist uLTRarunner. its coming up to two years since i began my loVE/HAte thing with the minimalist theory... although its been a very off and on type of thing. . .. i have never held a New Balance shoe, we just never crossed paths, i had thought it to be Nike for the longest time. ..none the matter. .. my curiousity has been aroused. . i may have to seek one out : )

and a final thought...

the gorGEOus ROGue RAcers.

2011-03-30T20:15:00.000-07:00

colour of choice: reef/voltage
Im really in loVE with the look of this shoe. We just started carrying it at the Co-op. Unfortunately the loVe affair ends there (story of my life) as my foot is slightly NOT the right shape. Montrail makes a really comfortable low-riding, snug midfoot shoe.. my problem is that Montrail also curves slightly inwards at the toebox which jams up my pinky toes... if you can imagine the shape of the vibram Fivefinger.. that is my foot to the 'T'. I use to joke about years ago when i got my first pair that Fivefinger had actually use my foot for the mold of the last... my toes like to be straight out... they do not turn in, therefore Montrails along with Brooks, do NOT fit me well :( now fortunately Montrails' fit a hUGe sizecurve of people and many, many runners have slightly turned in toes which creates no problems. . perhaps i should consider myself lucky that Fivefingers fit me so well and cut my losses with Montrail... oHhh ..but. but he's soooOO handsome and by the looks of him ..riDEs so well this is totally sad and out of my control ;/

tHE GOaL.. the project.

2011-03-25T22:54:00.000-07:00

Mandatory Equipment: A web series - Trailer from 1iOpen Productions on Vimeo.

okay.. sO THis biking stuff is tough but im getting it.. its sinking in.

2011-03-25T17:15:00.000-07:00

This weekend was test ride #2... fortunately this time around i was in the gORgeous bike that i'll be racing with.. the one and only little orange PHeonix, the Kona Kula GOld. She's adorable, tiny and fits me beautifully, im actually quite comfortable on her, a 16" hardtail, here's what her creators say about her; 'If you're focused on laying down some heavy trail beats, prepare to shatter all foes on the Kula Gold. Entering its second year of production, this trail slayer features a top ranking, Kona Factory Team inspired custom component package highlighted by a RockShox 100mm travel Reba fork with remote lockout. Throughout our entire line of Kula's we've lengthened top tubes and incorporated shorter stems and offset seat posts, creating a more balanced position on the bike. With a newly designed, more elaborate hyrdroformed frameset that's stiffer, lighter and faster-available in seven different sizes-this bike fits like a surgical speed glove.' … wOW.. i get so excited thinking about it.

Okay, but how'd she ride, you ask? Unfortunately the user, in this scenario, is the weakest link, but none the matter, its only a matter of time. Alright, so Saturday morning im on my way to Bellingham to hit some beautiful trails with the ME Team, oh yeS, its a sunny day. We're on trailhead for one-ish and i was *secretly* veRrry scared. I hadn't ridden the Kula on real trail yet... heck (am i serious.?) i hadnt really ridden on real trail yet (i have no memories of ever actually riding a mountain bike on a singletrack trail). ./yikes. for all of those feeling sadness for the new bicyclette, no worries, im in loVE.. the kula was well protected as i (with the help of the new/stiff cliPLess peddles) managed to cushion most of her falls. (*image to left: and this was my good thigh, i couldnt reach the backside damage... side thought: this is why my back is been painfully stiff, i thought i might be catching a flu or maybe just PMSing, ha, yeah.. ohwie lower back... i need a message :(..
so. The first few hours were quite painful as i couldnt unclip in time to catch ANY of my slip ups, which i had many. I was feeling alright (just taking it and trying to learn from it) but every time i flipped my bike i saw my teamates gringe in mixed emotions... I knew my first obstacle were the peddles... and i got the feeling that everyone else seem to think that was really the least of my worries..lol .. but really..the big problem.. were the peddles and the fact that my 'ultra*shitlight' wrench kept slipping in the hole. My first crash was within 30seconds of the trailhead. We'd started up the first steep switchback, i meant to float on my peddles but as soon as i had to start pumping it out for the hill they clipped in, i lost it and fell off to my right... off of the first switchback..lol...six feet down (it looked somewhat like the first photo, just a little sadder. SO crash after crash.. after crash, i was starting to feel slightly hopeless... i just had to find my trail mojo and quick, i could feel the team loose confidencE.. not in my drive but in my capability of pulling this off in time for the race. So, naturally, since it seemed to be my only option, i kept getting back onto the bike and trying again. I recall getting awfully miff and pumping so hard that i would flip the frontend up on top of me...arrgggg.. 'figure it out juDE.!' and i started to. The gals, both being wicked riders, help me out with technique and i spent the entire afternoon learning by practice.. Practice being said we felt we needed more, so , instead of the original Chuckanut Mountain trek plan we opted for another day of riding... i was into it.. but my body was terrified, im not sure i wanted another day of bicycle beats. 'suCK it up PRincess... heres an idea, if i ride smoother.. better, i wont fall as much and then i wont hurt as much.

ok.. todays' GOAL is to FOcus.
Day two - i ride up the same hill up to the cliff with no drops, flips or crashes... okay goOD STart.! WE hit some long up and down service roads, i warm up the legs, okay im ready.. throw some more at me. Loads of fresh logging as well so instead of hike biking we decided to connect as many of the single track trail as we could... (No Pics) ,i found a lot of these trails were really smooth, rolling and most obstacles were under a foot (which was stellar for me)... i taught the body to pump over rocks and roots (like you would paddle whitewater). So by the end of the day im very proud to sAY... ' i WAS actually riding through the trails, not just holding on but peddling through, rolling and crawling over rocks and logs. I do feel i put myself through perhaps a little too much pain and torture for the sake of quick learning.. i guess all i can say is that it was... a tough LOVE type of weekend. SoooO... when do we do it again.?

cAN, i call meself an uLTraRunner.?..

2011-03-11T19:28:00.000-08:00

.... hmmmm. can i call myself an uLTrarunner.?.. maybe.... labels. Yes.. i have rAN and continue to run distances greater then a marathon (42.2km) hence running 'ultra'marathons.. but the 'ultraRunner' label, isn't it reserved for those who have made a lifestyle out of ultrarunning.. huh! well, then, perhaps i am...
i AM an ULTRARUNNER... turned ADventure RAcer for one ePic race this Season... Lifestyle.. how do you mean you ask? Do you eat, breathe and live running.?.. well yes, yeS i do.. i wake, i fuel , i perform my tasks at greatest intensity while maintaning efficient and optimal heart rate, i fuel more... high nutirent and high (good) fats (*my theory is that you can teach your body to use fats as your optimal low-intensity performance fuel... a good ex is Udo Oil in the banana/spinach smoothies ... mMmmm. burns beautifully evenly till your next meal. I rUN... then i walk endlessly with good friends to encourage social activity..lol.. yah.. im serious. (my lonesome life has me feeling insane at the best of times... must... encourage... people. ..helps me feel normal. :) .i work for the biggest CAnadian Gear Co-op, which gives me all sorts of opportuninities to see this and many other AWESOME sports develop, advance and grow.. i speak to, learn from and inspire people everyday to play and protect our Outdoors spaces. i reAD TRAil Magazines and browse ENDurance Junkies' (like ME) blogs, i review and keep up (for the most part) with Gear, their COmpanies and their new technologies... i wear lube on my feet (all the time in any shoes, no longer to only prevent blisters, but now because i enjoy it), i wear an excessive amount of compression tights and my main units of measurements are grams and litres.. i enjoy eating at Brazilian MEat HOuses to replenish low protein stores.. i am fully, chest deep into the world of Trail and Adventure Running and ... that makes me happy... but then again, i AM female, my moods could flip and tomorrow it will make me sad, i'll overeat oh sweet yummy chocolate and cry by myself to Adam SAndler movies... so who knows... tonight...
i AM an ULTRARUNNER.

a nEW Direction.

2011-02-28T13:55:00.000-08:00

very veRy COol... what i loVEd most about COsta Rica this year was that it served as a catalyst for change, it's ignited a direction, my next foCUs which i knew i was in dire need of... i think i may have been searching for. Im taking on a challenging list of projects this year and im veRy excited about them... what i need to remember *(a personal note to read one day in reflection) is that any project i take on will go through its ups and downs as i will (mentally, emotionally and physically), life is balance and that things take time to develop (the good stuff anyways), be patient, inspiration is a beautiful thing, always RUn forward, reflect back but never look back... and open your heart to others and need nothing in return

Drawing Inspiration from Wesley Louis on Vimeo.
so..

...whats next./?
a bit of backstory - back in 2004, i was at the public library when i came across a 1997 Eco-challenge Australia VHS set... it looked incredible, and it planted a seed that would only continue to grow with the years. So, two years ago, the idea of running long distance came with my 'want' to experience a adventure like this (EC)... i thought - well... i cant run or bike, which should i tackle first? Running was the simplest choice, required the least amount of gear so i went with it. I figured, id spend a couple of years building a base in distance then id learn to negotiate the trails on a bike. So, ive MOuntain biked once in my Life (10 yrs ago).. a first-ish date down a black-diamond North Shore MB trail, it was a pretty unpleasent experience :{ that scared and kept me off a MB till this past week ..ive been, however, commuting to work (a 39.5km one-way road/trail route), it would take me 2-2.5hrs on my urban asphalt Kona Smoke bicyclette and id ride it a few times a week. (i eventually started running it for variety) ~ finally, this weekend i went down to snowy Seattle from sunny Vancouver and had the opportunity to ride again, it was a mess...lol. yep.. ive got a lot of practicing to do... the conditions were no where near goOD, but lets be realistic, when are they ever? (beside February in Costa Rica).
So, this year, ive been presented with an incredible opportunity to work with experience, talent and strength. I'll be joining a wicked Team to trek, ride, paddle and climb ~500km-ish of WEst Kootenays trail in the Raid the North Extreme...... sUPEr STOKed...!!! yah.. i have 5 months to prep...lol... 5 months to learn to ride a MOuntain bike, ha... yep.. i like a challenge alright :)

Eco-Challenge Fiji

iM So incredibly SCattered.

2011-02-24T22:51:00.000-08:00

So im about to attempt the worst... a 10min snapshot into my inner randomness. I just cant think, feeling suffercated in my own mind, i have too much to think about.

*image to right - Jen Segger and Fernando Gonzàlez, day 6 running up a long riverbed in Corcovado National Park, COsta RIca.

and the 10min timer is... .. .ON
.run... why do i run? i like the adventure, the colors, i like watching things change. i run on trails and in the city, parks, beaches... i dont like the repetitive movement of purely running, in short burst yES, but the continuest pounding of pavement..yuk, it better be a waaAAy scenic route to make it worth my wiLD. WiLD.. i loVE trail... my favorite? hmmmmm.... smooth, technical (rocky/rooty) singletrack.. muddy in the trees, ..BOardwalk..ahh goRGeous, however .. sliCK. yiKES!... im the pRincess of cLUmsy, which is why i have only - ran - to date... bUT....
....
..i believe that might chANge ./:)
i should be drinking much more wATEr then i am... i loVE drinking coffee con Leche et miel, Sil vous plait.
bEEp...DOes coffee enhance my athletic performance?.. it seems to worsen it if i don't drink it... coffee is an addiCTion.. :( or simply a viCE.. :) ..piPEDreams, everyones got them...me - id love to have developed a (small) coffee eMPire... take the bean straight from my well loved coffee plantation (in COstaRica, 2nd home), design a complete brand out of it (name it SOlid [pronounced so-leede, develop the best 'climbers' coffee.. create a finely ground instant mix (like VIA) for the backcountry or the 2am aid station :)...MMmmmm coffee...ohhh... balance it out with electrolytes... adds soME Carbs..Aand it could become THE ONLY FOOD!.. nah... thats getting silly.
... SO i think itd be wicked if a bunch of you posted in this entry, your 'piPEDreams'... the more you let it out, the closer you are to making it reality.. FOr a goOD example... i once had this piPEDream that i would rUN UTMB. That at the time seemed as likely as becoming a ROckstar (although being a rockstar would not involve exercise :), i didnt run..ha..ever, lol! i was into other things..art, computers, nature, work,... so one day, i wrote it down in a yellow 'idea' notebook (2004) under a 'fantasy' subhead, it read - Run an Ultramarathon, Ultra trail Mont BLanc sounds nice. Feasability (scale 1-10) 1.5
...ive yet to run UTMB but ive run biGGEr... im confident in my ability, its no longer a pipedream, a fantasy, just need to get in the race lottery now... hmmm perhaps i should start designing my coffee logo : ) .. so yah.. go ahead, share your pipedream... with my blog WOrld :)

sCOtt JUrek in the ULTRARUNNER.

2011-02-17T00:45:00.000-08:00

ULTRA RUNNER from Cedar Wright on Vimeo.

bELieve yOU CAn... sounds simple enough.

2011-02-16T22:18:00.001-08:00

the pULL BAck… a test of ego and experience.

2011-02-12T17:05:00.001-08:00

I've been sensing a change coming for some time… call it intuition or simply creative goal-setting but either way, the shift has happened. Finishing the COastal Challenge was the highest step in my Life's current expedition. What's left now is the slippery descent and journey debriefing… (side note: i ran my first marathon less then two years ago, my body is just beginning to learn to rUN ULtras).

Soooo… the pULL BAck.
How hard do i rUN? Since the technical terrain, heat and humidity dictated my daily condition, it seemed to be a better idea to go by feel rather then speed. So what happened that i felt i needed to slow down, to pull back… well, i wanted to finish, simple as that. Up to date, my race attitude has always been… give it my ALL, leave nothing behind, but in a staged race, i proved last year that the theory is hugely flawed.
The first 5km of DAy one, - my pace is good, i can maintain this for 220 more kms…NOT.. the heat hits me, my heart rate spikes.. but its a race and everyones pushing? okay… oKAy.. sTOP…. hOW do i feel? i need to slow it down, what am i proving by pushing this haRD… whaTS my goAL?… i want to rUN across that finish line in six daYS… yah.. the finish… no more DNFs, last years' Coastal Challenge was my only one, and id like to keep it that wAY, even if i have to crawl through the finish line…. im sTROng.. i WILL do this… i CAN do this…. oKAy, soooo… i need to pULL BAck, i'll save it for the eND…
SO as the days went by, i kept a pretty easy pace, trying to not over exert myself but my ego was suffering. The mentality is that this is a race, i train hard, to push hard and if im not pushing hard then im not trying, im not pushing my best… i felt disappointed that i wasn't pushing, i somehow felt that i was robbing my mind and body of the cruel punishment it needed to jump whatever hurdle Life had faced me up against.
By dAY FOur, i was finished, as we climbed relentlessly for what felt like 30-40 mins my boDY was shutting DOwn… kaput. FiNi. I had rAN out of juice, my legs were dead, my stomach was turning… i wanted to throw up… THEn… i rUN into Joseph, this polite, over-caring AUStrian, Mel Gibson lookalike. - 'jUDE, you don't look good, have you been drinking water?', well… of course i had, i'd had a few sips every 10mins as per usual…. but wait.. 'Joseph, hOW long have we been running?', 'just about 3hrs… jUDE?'…… wHAT?!? 3hrs…oh mAN.. that's why im feeling like poop, ive had barely anything to drink…arRRGGGgg, sTUpid girl… oKAy… drink. So, i managed to drink a couple bottles of fluid and electrolytes and my day turned around, i finished strong.
The next day was steady and then.. the FiNAL dAY… i kicked some serious bottom, needing to save nothing for the following dAY, i rAN with heart, i pushed every hill… i FELT GREAT, i felt strong, i felt like i was rewarding myself with the pain and pleasure of pushing past my limits… and i lOVEd it…i finished with tears of JOy, i had made myself proud…. i finished my raCE, i won my medal…. FiNi.
Lesson was that i learned to pULL BAck, to rUN more comfortably in order to finish... will i use this lesson in every race from now on.... aBSolutely, probably not, but ive learned to listen and if in the future im faced with a similiar scenerio, i will pull back in order to accomplish my initial goal.

the prOCCESsing.

2011-02-08T06:07:00.000-08:00

ALways a little slow to process what just happened, what i learned and how much of an impact it has had… and im sure i wont fully get right into it until im back in my home in Vancouver, which will not be till March the 1st…. but heres the feeling as of today.
The COastal Challenge this year was an absolutely incredible experience as it promised all it's competitors, no candy coating here. It was tough… it was gruelling, hot and downright uncomfortable for most of it but you see thats what made it such a growing experience. For me, it's all about the experience, what will make me stronger, smarter, what experiences and lessons will i learn that will transfer over to all parts of my Life. Im constantly being told, (especially from the Ultrarunning community) that im young, im inexperiences, i have so much still ahead, often looked at as an hyperactive child, oblivious to this challenging world we live in… and they're right … im young, im inexperienced and i have many years to look forward to but what most fail to understand our my motifs for challenging myself and my Life long struggles that have brought me to this point… my body may be young but my mind has had Lifetimes of suffering, pain, and hard lessons.
"It's an awful truth that suffering can deepen us, give a greater luster to our colors, a richer resonance to our words. That is, if it doesn't destroy us, if it doesn't burn away the optimism and the spirit, the capacity for visions, and the respect for simple, yet indispensable things." ~Queen of the Damned

My main goal this year was to finish this race, since last year I choose to pull out due to severe medical circumstances. (backtrack to Feb2010 in my blog entries to read the story) Although, physically this year, i was in AWEsome condition, the body amounts only to a small factor in a race of this extreme caliber. Besides the obvious terrain, distance and heat, a race like this is about mental toughness, you either have it or you find it within yourself. Everyday was a rollercoasters of highs and lows… for everybody, which adds another hard factor, since as humans we tend to feed on the energy around us, every single incredible competitor was going through their own rollercoaster of positive and negative feelings. Feelings of happiness, accomplishments, feelings of failure and self-doubt… i can do this… i cant do this, this is possible i'll make it through the week… who am i kiddin… im not strong enough, i haven't trained for this, im injured… i suck! Struggles of the everyday, sounds familiar… so how do we drown that horrid little voice inside our heads that hinder us from chasing dreams, accomplishing goals… we test it, we acknowledge it and we begin to understand that with patience, everything passes, our spirits are unbreakable when we believe in ourselves, when we believe in others.

random tidbits of processing… gotta run. Oh and very cool… my ego's moment of light, LASt day of the Race i made the Spanish news… a tidbit in the 'Nacion' a fast 1st female finish :)

dAY fiVE…

2011-02-05T16:18:00.000-08:00

oNE Final stage to go, and this one should be a treat.

So far… i've seen some pretty spECial stuff, gain some pretty incredible experience and learned another, great lesson …the Pull back.
So evening before our final stage, im sitting quietly in a small one room schoolhouse in Drake Bay. The desks have all been pushed against the wall to make room to set up our RAce medical Team. Im reflecting on the week, how i feel, how ive done.

Physically - Strong, %100 minus a few bumps ,cuts and bruises. My muscles are slightly stiff, the worst was the second day, then by the end of the third day (after some sunset yoga), they were well on their way to healing (key is protein/carb meal after the run, not so easy when the body is under the stress of an extreme 6 day jungle race). Then theres my feet in aWESome condition, no blisters but many blackening toenails (whatever, thats fine, just makes the downhill a little tricky), and only slightly swollen and considering the amount of foot carnage our doctors have seen so far (due to extremely wet/hot climate), the condition of mine even impresses me.

Mentally - incoherent, raving, babbling, irrational; feverish, frenzied; ecstatic, euphoric, elated, thrilled, overjoyed. My brain is exhausted after running over 200km of gorgeous COsta RIcan jungle terrain, with over 10 000 meters (not feet) of accent gain already down, you can only imagine how trilled i am to only have a measly 450 m remaining. Then there's my moods (to be expected), happy, grumpy, easily hurt, attention deficit… high emotion, low emotion… thankfully, for the most part, i've been somewhat controlling them.

Fuel - I've been carrying a cycling Nalgene with me wherever i go and a tube of NUUN electrolyte tabs, trying to stay super hydrated, the humidity and heat down here are killer. Mornings, i've been skipping breakfast and making my own: 1 1/2 cup of water, 2 tbsp of chia seeds, 1 1/2 tbsp of hemp hearts and a bit of Canadian Maple Syrup (brought from home) and a bottle of water. During the rUNs, i've been carrying a 1.5L water bladder and a handheld bottle with CarboPro and blue Gatorade mix, then watermelon at the aid station. My stomach has been happy and problem free. When the stas finished i eat as much solid food as i can consume which vie been finding that im super hunger…. very good as compared to last years Coastal Challenge where i couldn't eat a single bite.

All in all, in in pretty good shape for the tiny 20 something km tomorrow.

dAy 4... quick update.

2011-02-02T18:44:00.000-08:00

Well im feeling slightly deLIRIOus... heat exhaustion,... maybe. My skin is radiating heat, i sit and my skin explODEs into millions of salty water bubbles... its hot, im hot! The hard days are finally over. The last three days, after a gentle first day, we were fed to the grueling merciless jungle, knee high clay engulf our every steps, vines wrapped around our exhausted legs and insects squealed vociferously deep into our weary ears.... i LOVEd it. Physically, im in good health. My feet, besides seven blackening toenail are in wicked shape, no blisters, and they've been wet since Sunday. My mind is slightly emotional (sucks) but i've not been sleeping more then three hours per night....

HOnestly, the thought of writing right now seems really silly, my mind is overtired and not thinking super straight... i do think however, if i were to write, i'd be hilarious, i feel like i've been drinking nothing but beer for the last four days... could be worst

rainforest rUN - day one

2011-01-31T18:11:00.000-08:00

DAy One…
one word.. HOT! so grab a cup a coffee and watch my 11 minute recap :)
.....
..........

heRE WE Are....

2011-01-30T02:06:00.001-08:00

Alright... its 4am (2am Vancouver time) and we're all getting ready to go... This years race is going to be unbelievable. The terrain is going to be aggressive, humid, extremely wet and hot... am i ready... YOU BET i AM :)

Today we run around 33.5kms, an easy warm up day...lol, right! Everyone is excited the energy is beaming as we are all about to venture on wht is sure to provide us all with an unforgettable ADVENTURE.... oh how i love adventure... however... time to prep...

GOOD MORNING! and best wishes for all our competitors, family and friends as i know how intense it can be to watch from thousands of miles away.

cOUNtdOWn to COastal CHAllenge...

2011-01-22T09:49:00.000-08:00

7 days....

I arrive in Costa RIca late last night. This is my second time here in this gorgeous Tropical Paradise. HOwever, this year, instead of sitting in a sauna a few minutes a day for two weeks pre-race, i decided to come a week early to acclimatize to the heat and humidity... and its a good thing. Last night i slept great, although i woke up sopping wet in my own sweat every hour... id wake up soaked and frozen, throw the covers over me only to overheat and do it all over again... nonetheless, i loVE the heat and it was wonderful. Early morning swim and coffee cured me right up.

So today im heading to Montezuma to stay at this beautiful little bungalow. I'll be there for the week to get used to the heat and to loosen up with some yoga, running and Zumba (yep, you heard right... the 'juDE' is going to attempt to learn a few sexy, spanish dance moves...lol... right, when it comes to dance, i have the elegance of a rhino on iceskates).

i anticipate a most AWESOME week followed my nothing but an AWESOME other week :)
Which brings me back to AWESOM'ness #2... the Coastal Challenge. SO here's how to follow me, Team CANADA, and the dozens of other AWESOME racers... they'll be standings, news from the trails, facts, photos... its guaranteed to be a GREAT race to follow.
1) TCC Coverage Blog - live Feed
and also in spanish at LEad ADventure Media
2) on TCC's FACEBOOK and on LEAD MEDIA's FACEBOOK
3) also on twitter TCC's TWITTER and LEAD's TWITTER

so there you have it... cheers.

fOR THat ONe Moment...

2011-01-14T22:32:00.000-08:00

That one moment when you find yourself gliding over your trail, you feel a rush of complete content, you feel loVE, joy... you're in the perfectly right place at that exact moment you need to be... everything makes perfect sense.

weLL... it's about time i speak to the blog world again... so whats on my mind these days..
A lot of this...
'...there are moments where you are just fluid and flowing' - Kami Semick

though #1...billion - what bags and gear will i travel with for 5 weeks? I've never travelled for 5 weeks, what will i want, what will i need, what will i bring? Travelling for a race is one thing, you bring your race gear, something to write on and something that smells clean to wear :) 5 weeks.. i have many loVES beyond running, which will i set up to do?... for sure i know the sketchbook, harmonica, paintbrushes and camera are coming. I had originally wanted to plan a bike trip or a trekking coast-to-coast trip... but lacked the skills to logistically plan it and couldn't juggle enough time to act on it. ...also, I've been really wanting to get into fiLMing, i'd loVE to do some documentaries/sports flicks, however.. 1-im better in front of the camera and 2-im so ADD, i cant sit long enough to learn the programs or equipment to work with video (self-teaching has always been hard for me, its much easier to learn by listening).

thought #2... - am i prepared to race the COastal Challenge? heck yah... i think, there's been a few bumps along the roAD... that have slowed recent training progress, however i am so much farther along athletically then i was last year... o this is good. :) Head space in an event like this is key, which is so easy to be constantly happy & positive around this race. The TCC Staff and Volunteers are overwhelmingly kind & good-humored, the food (breakfast, snack, and dinners) are incredibly delicious, the cooking team really go all out, you feel loVE in their preparations and the fruit...OMG>> i've never been more pleased by simply eating fruit :)
so.. all i have to do is run, eat and be merry... how hard can that be, i was BORN ready :)

thought #3...173 - Tonight i ran in the city, by the water. It was pelting heavy rain and i was loving it. So quiet, very few wanderers on the streets. I was super comfortable wearing a pair of Decente C6 compression tights , a Mountain Hardwear super hoody, and my ARc'teryx Alpha SL Gor-tex jacket, a really awesome combo paired with Nike Pegasus (cushioned hard surface shoe), a light, synthetic toque and a small Nathans hydration bladder... i figure - there's no such thing as bad weather... just inappropriate gear.... now if i could only remember what i used to run in when it was hot outside (im not sure ill remember how to run in the sun...lol)... goodbye rainy city.. i loVE you , however this little body was built for sunshine...
too many thoughts these days, you.. see but a miniscule sampling. i have only but a few days to tie away loose ends. i look forward to removing myself from my cold, rainy city life (which i do absolutely loVE in its own way). i anticipate this five week aDVenture to be EPic and to awaken some unstoppable change... growth and idEAs!

my liTTLe brOKEn wing.

2011-01-04T18:18:00.000-08:00

What should have been my most intense training week leading up to bEAUtiful Costa Rica turned into more of a base week :[ WHat haPPEned? well... i'll tell you... Christmas day, i was shifting some storage boxes around, i must have miscalculated the length of one of them because as i turned around i smashed the box into the wall which directly sMAShed into my chest. Fractured the top rib, it'll heal. All's goOD.. The next day im stiff, really stiff,(didn't know it was fractured till now, a week later) back to work 2 days later and im in tears by noon... the pain is awful, but decide to do my best to suck it up. I stayed really active, walking and running for the next 4 days, and then decided the pain was not healing, i had to stOP. I really wanted to run the FAt ASs 50km on New Years day, and i did, and felt alright. I had rested for a few days prior and again for a few days after. However, toDAy, i head into the trails and ouCH.... so i leave the hydration behind, nothing on my back, nothing in my hands run for an hour and ive had enough.. ouch, im heading home :(

Frozen ASs 50km & swim (without the swim)

2011-01-01T18:35:00.000-08:00

inCREDibly pleased with today's performance... i felt GREat! 50km - 4:48:00
I woke up to -4 degree cold (24F) and clear skies... it was going to be sunny :) (First year in many, no snow, slush or rain on NewYear's DAy...wow).

So the horrid self-talk began before the run even did... 'this is going to hurt, you're in no shape, i can barely breathe, my chest is still all bruised up, i haven't ran in 3 days because of it, i didn't eat enough, i didn't sleep enough, blah, blah, blah.......... new Years REsolution... blow out that annoying, winny flicker of a voice inside my head.' AS it turns out, today was an incredibly beautiful day, sunny, cold and i was wearing compression tights, a performance skin, a HH one/wool combo, a Patagonia nine trail jacket, toque and gloves.... my tempature was just about perfect. :) i simply can't wait to be where i belong... the sun. Costa Rica, i loVE everything about you... unmm, except the spanish-speaking thing... my vocabulary consists of approx. two or so words... 'bonita' and 'cafe... por favor'.
back to the rUN...
....
..So its 8:50something and all 120ish participants (running everything in between 1-50km & one crazy cool Joe 100km).. i don't know the route so i figure im going to just follow the crowd... howEVer.. as the crowd spun from speaker to photo to race start, i was near the front...so.. time goes off and we all start running... i see Gary Robbins hobbling his little heARt out, trying to once again maintain a lead... but its a losing battle, i throw out a few wise cracks, he's too intensely focusing on his forward momentum to even notice...lol (due to very unfortunate circumstances, Gary could not set a record today :( next year Gary)...
.. I keep running and find myself next to this (very quick) runner, Ryan, I had met Ryan earlier that year when we so Epically lost ourselves on the backside of Seymour...'have no fear.. we could run forever... and we did :)'... so i figured i'd follow him.. ha... i quickly realized that i might have been running next to Ryan, however i also had a pack of 8 or so... verY, VERY ELite men breathing down my neck... silLY Girl... what was i doing, i am not leading this pack, not today...lol.
... i held on for about 20mins and then decided that if i wanted to finish this today, i had to pull back, so i did. i eventually found my happier pace, still uncomfortable but tolerable for hours on end. i ran with a fascinatingly handsome character (second one this week, i must be leaking pheromones again...lol), thankfully he knew the trails. Then 25km flew by and i was turning around to run back :) did i mention how gORGeous of a day it was, sunny... sun... oh, i loVE sun! so biG Thanks to all the great people of Club Fat Ass for making this happen... todaY ROcked!

“The truth that many people never understand, until it is too late, is that the more you try to avoid suffering the more you suffer because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you in proportion to your fear of being hurt”
Thomas Merton quotes

neUROplasticiTY..

2010-12-31T11:01:00.000-08:00

goOD, bAD... indifferent, all the same.. or perhaps not.
last day of 2010...
SO i watched a really in depth documentary on 'Neuroplasticity' yesterday. Its a fascinating topic, from what i took from it, 'Neuroplasticity (also known as cortical re-mapping) refers to the ability of the human brain to change as a result of one's experience,' - wikipedia . Its how our brains sort through and sends information, its how our physical body reacts to a visual world HOw experiences, simulations and training can enhance our neuroplasticity, our finely tuned personal expertise.
' from daily practice and concentrated effort, we turn abilities into expertise. WE become experts at something that requires very specific training like playing an instrument, but it also means we become experts at anything in which we pay concerted attention.'
Practice becomes are greatest strength, Practice creates lasting changes in our brain chemistry, a sort of muscle memory, that builds over a lifetime of experience. Point is, you want to be really good at something, you have to honestly give it your all, you want to be the BEST at something, well then you have to find it within yourself to give more then your all... i once read a study that went to describe the differences in how men and women motivate themselves in competition. Males were driven to compete against others, to be better, faster, stronger, to simply be more then his competitors. As opposed, females were driven by themselves, to be better, faster, stronger versions of what they have previously been, the other competitors played a much smaller role in their performance. I think the theory holds true, at least in my experience. I often have males refer to me as competitive, but competitive for them is competing with each other... not me, (i cant be bothered to let your performance effect mine) i set my goal, i give what i will, and that's where my performance analysis comes from. I loVE the Ultrarunning events for this... it seems, at most times, that the only challenge is finishing, how simple, you win or you lose, you accomplish what you set out to do or you don't. That being said, in the Ultrarunning World, it seems that the most commonly shared accomplishment is finishing these grueling, long distances (male or female, podium, no podium... everyone who finishes gets the prize (a turkey platter belt buckle..lol... in some wicked cases!.. i want one :))

hapPY NEw YEar Everyone... heer heer.. to discovering and practicing our individual expertise. So my advice to you.. 'Create yourself, who do you want to be. Tomorrow will be a new day, a new year, we strive and grow with change, anything and everything is within our reach. We dream it, we believe it and become it.... so chase your goals... TO A FANTASTIC 2011!

rANDom tidBits.

2010-12-19T00:31:00.000-08:00

12.10.10

A really wicked day out and about. it started with an early 5am start... cofFEe, breakfast prep with Juraj for morning PK, which ended up being a wicked pk(product knowledge), we had the rep from moving comfort, a bra company talk to us about breast... and bOY, i tell ya! i walk away from that little 1.5hr talk a new woman with such a deeper understanding for the soft fragile tissue we have ...lol.. no but for serious! its important to support the girls and to understand how to suggest the right one to the right person...
....so after that, i had the afternoon to train, so i headed out to the ocean (DeepCove) and ran up to MT.Seymour... gorgeous as always... i needed the mountains today :( i felt awfully lonely, i needed their comfort, their loVE. Came home, ate smoothie with tons of added yummys and off to the gym i went, for yet another butt-kickin' from Dave (a wicked, passionate trainer)...oh and of course i had to warm up with a steady little 30min tempo on the treadmill...
...then, came home, changed, met a friend for yummy sushi (salmon sashimi, my favorite) and we finish the eve with a 2.5hr coffee walk... im happy and very tired :)
so... i'd loVE to start writting down more of my random bits, unfortunately, i often think of them as im running.. which since im running, i also forget. Crunch time for COsta RIca is coming, im now only six weeks away and im feeling fairly unfocused. There's planning to do and im overwhelmed with it all, i won't lie.

12.17.10

Planning: 35 days till departure, 45 days till Stage 1 of the ‘Rainforest’ coastal challenge, and 72 days till my very first 100mile day.

12.18.10

It’s funny just hoW MUch of Life is a cycle, yes, a cycle with a new path around each turn, but a cycle none the less. We go up, we go down (the more passion you have = the higher your highs and the lower your lows), we make mistakes (our own and some for others), we learn, we grow. When things finally do settle down and become unvaried, colorless, monotonous… the cycle begins again and our character grows.

As odd as it is to display to the web and whomever wishes to see it… my life and inner thoughts, it’s been super helpful as a tool to learn more about myself and grow as an athlete. This blog started together with the ‘UltraRunning’ chapter of my Life, almost two years ago.

My athletic background: I was a playful kid, always outside getting my dresses dirty and scraping my knees. Although, many of my years were spent overweight, due to the lack of my mother’s nutritional education (and that of most of her generation) I always had a wild spirit. I didn’t participate in sports besides baseball and hockey with afterschool kids, I didn’t make my grade school volleyball team… or basketball team. It wasn’t until grade 9 that I discovered rugby, which I fell in love with or with the idea that I could play a sport and lead a team (I was good, a natural). As the years past and rugby grew my athletic confidence, I became much more curious about muscle composition and capabilities. It soon became apparent to me that I not only had an ideal body to grow and shape strong muscles, I had an incredible mental endurance from years of parental abuse and dysfunction. Then May 13, 2006 I decided to run my first race, a grueling, rocky… 6km trail in Golden Ears park, the hardest 53 minutes of my life, I thought I was gonna die…. My heartrate must have been in the 190s the entire distance, but I survived.... i worked my way up to a half marathon, then two years later, I decided that I wanted to run a marathon before entering my second Life quarter… and I did. The day before my 26^th Birthday I ran the most grueling, flat and excruciatingly long marathon of my Life, 3:48:00 I was finished and... feeling awfully sick I was super content… after that day I realized that I really enjoyed the journey of going the distance, pushing what i think our my limits… so naturally, i then signed up for 7months of intense training leading up to a 225km foot race in warm Costa Rica…

So…. Five weeks till the start of my 2^nd time racing in Costa Rica. The 225km of the Coastal Challenge this past year was a huge milestone, previous to that race, I had only ran a 45km section of STORMY. I was new to long distance running… that, would be a vast understatement. So… my first Year in the UltraRunning world done. Five weeks from now, I’ll attempt to finish the Costal Challenge. Last year, I choose to sit a day out.. I choose to DNF, it's still a hard decision to choke down to this day. Now, im back… with many more miles under my feet and a little more heart, ready to run the race of my Life and take in all that comes my way.

boNE CHillin' rainy city daYS only means one thing... sNOwy mountain daYS!

2010-11-30T21:49:00.000-08:00

WEll first, i guess i should start with the fact that im saddened by the lack of skis i have :(... still waiting to put my setup together. So far, I've decided on the Scarpa Gea women 'snot' touring boot, a lightweight yet rigid four buckle design and quite possibly match them up with a pair of locally design G3 skis and setup... problem is that snow is now.. and im not on skis.
However, i find i must keep busy so i still had an AWEsome day. It roCKed to be out in the icy, stormy rain today, refreshing... and challenging... i loVE the elements, quite possibly a part of the magic that mountains have. So today was to be a ski day however im not quite set up so.. commute to Surrey instead on my bicycle. Now, brilliant me decided that today would be a great day to try out the new clip-in pedals....lol. yah. brilliant! It's an incredibly odd feeling to come to a stop (lets say at a light) and now NOT be able to move your feet and knOWing there's nothing to do but fall over :(... it happened twice behind the same guy...lol.. he was feeling really bad for me :( i think i probably looked quite pathetic, a wet, muddy puppy that cant stand straight. awwwww... but either who, the ride... i eventually got the hang of it (sortof) and made it to the ALex Fraser... mmmmmMmmm i smell coffee... okay, i gotta stOP, im so cold, its been 2.5 hrs of pelting frozen rain. Numm numm sit, warm, drink coffee, have random aWEsome conversation with tall stranger. Then decide to get picked up...:( the judester gave up, it had now become dark, traffic was wiLD and it was raining HArd... and pavement huRTS.

TRaining is looking really promising. I found a fellow to help me with strength, mostly in stabilizing and balancing muscles, build a strong core and kick my performance up a notch. I even practiced some hip opening yoga this week, super helpful (Eion Finn has some great home routines)

The Pursuit of Happy Hips now on Body in Balance TV from blissology on Vimeo.

very, very stoked for COsta Rica sneaking up on me :) i loVE thy suNSHine.

dAY TWo - goTTa keep the moMENtum growing.

2010-11-17T00:26:00.000-08:00

iM so stoKEd. my ducks are in a row and im ready to go. the weather's getting cold, and i'll happily endure 2.5 months of it running, training, eating delicious foods and learning to backcountry ski, stYLe a la toUR! 10 week countdown to warm, heated, bright and beautiful coSTA RIca! ... and what a beautiful way to see the land and experience its culture but to run 250kms of it in a steady, staged (grueling) six day race :)../warm fuzzy feelings inside. THe Coastal Challenge, is an incredibly challenging, exhilarating, heart pounding, mountain and jungle race and the moST beAUTiful thing you will ever experience... it is my focus, my driving foRCe. i haVE A RAce to Fini ! Finish, done. and to think It all started January pass when my little heArt wanted to ruN really, really faST and my body didn't. The contributing factors: my inefficient caloric intake and the hernia tear and the dark roast coffee-like toilet fluids... it, was a mess! What i was really wishing for at the time was the guidance of my most beloVEd coACh, im still so young in the Ultra woRLD and its a world that i like very much. ... however ./giddy, super happy, my coAch and a great little team of Canadian athletes will be there this Year... tO RePREsent . GO CANADA!

so my ducks... the hole in my stomach fixed, the gianormous hematoma covering my entire hamstring almost healed (sortof - enough to run :), and my coACh back on ... 10 WEeks to machine juDE. but first theres a gianormous amount of planning and training to do.

so tRAIning... dAY TWo was a success. I had the immense pleasure in taking a group of complete beginner trail runners (with varied high-activity backgrounds) onto one of my favorite trails (DIez Vista, Buntzen ~15km, 987m total elev. gain, rugged forest trails). NOw, those of you not from Vancouver have no idea that its been incredibly cold, dark and rainy here for what seems like weeks and wow, to my surprise will continue, SO... of course we planned for the worst and received the best... sUN, WOW really?! is this just a short sucker hole... a one day window, sweET i'll take it! (this trip was planned six weeks back). The day turned out to be incredibly AWESOME, the group was WICKED, spirits were high, LOVEtank was full. Everyone did so weLL and i was able to create this incredibly rewarding ADventure for them... it was a goOD day.

dAY ONe was off... a strong 6am, 60min Tempo run that grew into a skuLL-spiltting migraine by 2pm (im talking...PLEASE HELP find me the darkest hole so that light will stop hurting me), a fever and 3hrs of afternoon sleep... yikes, but then woke at 6pm and i felt like nothing had happened, i was actually quite productive for the rest of the evening.... bizarre.

dAY THree... still to come.

2 wks Post Surgery - im goOD!

2010-10-20T00:25:00.000-07:00

i had a great dAY! I'll admit, it started out kinda slow, refusing to get off of my new comfy mattress (THank yoU beautiful people of ikEA for creating this masterpiece) It's been honestly years since i've had this quality of sleep and my body is responding well... imagine that. Coffee and then a day in training. So, 2 weeks post mid abdominal hernia surgery, and my body is feeling goOD. My general goal post surgery was simply to stay active, and that's exactly as im doing. With the help of great friends and beautiful weather i've managed to walk everyday, work my way up to the time on my feet and Sunday i walked exploring my beautiful city for just over 8 hours, no discomfort and im back on track. Today... i hopped onto my bicycle (first time in weeks) and rode through Vancouver across the Lions Gate bridge into the Kintec Footlabs on Marine Drive to listen to an inCReadible superhuman, jEN SEgger .

Part II - So after a great day at work, i was heading to North Van to listen to jEn Segger speak. She shared some of her ADventures she's had these last few years and it was AWesome to listen to.. People inspire People. Whether it be Jen Segger, Barry Blanchard, Ray Zahab, Frank Wolf, Cedar Wright, Jason Kruk, Beth & Tommy... (to name just a few) and its great..'cus every sport, discipline and hobbie comes with their very own set of 'superhumans'; the folks who inspire us to do our best, to put and see value in the things we do, and they are also the folks that remind us how strong and limitless the human spirit is....

then... to top off my Soiree,

... i wIN a PRize, but not just any prize.... goOD kARma... a Salomon XA 10+3 hydration pack :)... i AM SOoo excited, i believe this bag has found me and i am very, veRY excited to hit some trails with it. Thank you miLLIons JEn, Salomon and Great people of Kintec (they put on a fabulous show).

IT's quite late and im just realizing hoW little sense im probably making, or perhaps its that there is way more dialogue behind my half asleep eyes :)

... i cant wait to go running.

the GNarrr will have to wait a few more weeks.

2010-10-05T22:13:00.000-07:00

Things are going pretty well, im getting back in the groove of things, finding my routine, my zen.. running a training schedule again, riding my bike, im feeling good and getting super stoked for the change in seasons... in other words... i was ready to put the GNarrr back in my step. I was spending time debriefing my latest adventure and preparing myself for a sCOokum position opportunity at work.

and thennN......

'juDE ULtra you have a call on 101, juDE 101'. Who could be calling me at work?

'allo, juDE here'. 'hi juDE, this is so and so from the hospital, we've scheduled you in for surgery for this wednesday... do you have a pen?'

....What? It's been eight months since i tore this 4inch gap in my abdominal and now, this wednesday, im not ready, aND... im suppose to be instructing my first trail-running clinic, this couldn't be any worst. So whats this mean?? ... (with a biG pout)....recovery.. : ( and probably loads of eating... well because i get cOLd and i loVE food and food burns creating heat via energy, and i hate being cold :) ... oh wait, my abdominals are being sewn together... perhaps all the eating will have to wait, arrgggGG! way to aggravate an Ultrarunner... take the food away..... so, i've been a wreck all day, dazed and anxious... and now hungry from the fast for the surgery.

oh boy. Recovery is going to be hard. I know i'll push as soon as im mobile and then what?, i tear open again... i have no idea hoW i'll stay relatively unmobile (insert welcomed suggestions here) hmmm, well, i have recently pick up the harmonica :) It also seems that this blog is seriously missing some meat & potatoes, so perhaps i'll write a little more.

Wow... does going into surgery ever feel like running a ultra... im willingly going to inflict myself pain in exchange for a stronger body... but with no food, before, during or after and no shinny medal.... ./pout

....

a yummy post ride mix - cereal; 1/2 walnuts, 1/2c pumkin granola, a couple of slices of sulferic-free papaya (whatever that means) they are the most natural dried fruit ive ever had and so delicious. 1med granny smith pomme... all chopped and diced up with 3lrg tbsp of vanilla (low sugar) yogurt. MMmmmmmm.....

15 min quickie - the hourglass is running.

2010-09-26T09:52:00.000-07:00

So... i woke this morning and just felt the need to hit the waterside for a good recovery run. IT's 7:23... im off. My chest and lungs hurt, they feel heavy... just push, they'll warm up. As i get into the groove of the hills down to the water, i analyze my current state.... 3 week with a head/chest cold, antibiotics, 8day mountain trip, two recovery days, a fast-paced ~15km trail race, a 4 hour walk and now a morning run in heavy mist... hows my nutrition been... yikes, nevermind. My body has been working double time these last few weeks, ive been asking a lot of it... but so far so good... im getting stronger... but OUch, really... my body aches! I need more protein.

Post run snack juice - Magic bullet; 1cup OJ, 1lg grapefruit, lg handful of spinach, 2tbsp vanilla yogurt, udo oil.... perhaps next time i'll add something a little sweeter, it was awfully citrusy and a multi-vitamin plus a sm handful of walnuts. In about 30mins, i'll have a bagel before i head off to work.

A side note, i finally met Tom CRaik yesterday (an inspiring runner, a dynamic character.. a finely tuned, well built creature)... his eNERgy was incredible. However, on the flip, I also met someone else i had been waiting a long time to meet, but the positive vibe was far absent... how very disappointing to meet someone you think so highly of and then to be let down :( murr... oh well. Tom Craik on the other hand.... very cool character.

back tO BAsics.

2010-09-25T22:34:00.000-07:00

sept 24th...

where's juDE? 2 months no entry... Lost & stalling is the short answer. I've been trying to go with the flow but it feels lately that ive been trying to stall life, trying to make it stand still so that i can figure out how to walk. Now these past few months have had their share of Adventures, i do say but Procrastination has been much too dominant it seems. I've been trying to figure out how i can best make an impact in my Life and in the lives of others. I can't sit still... i WOn't! (...but where ?then? can my skills be best used).... i've grown a fond loVe for running in the mountains. I'm not sure whether i found it or it found mE, but either way my spirit seeks to thrive in it. I'm looking for my way to make a difference, to effect a life or a community, to create growth, innovation and happiness. I think of my everyday Life as a testing ground for future consequences, so i figure i have to seek aDVEnture, it seems if i must learn from daily life, life will forever have to challenge me.... so as this is beginning to seem like a cycle for me, i sit and try to analyze my last few challenges. I once heard that 'we don't liVE long enough to make all of our own mistakes' so perhaps by sharing my adventures and my challenges with you.. 'mon cherie blogge' and perhaps in turn, i will inSPire others to live & loVE.

the moUNTAins of the Chilcotins.

a few weeks back, i was given an opportunity to join a team of fellow co-workers on an 8 day aDVanced BAckpaking trip into the Chilcotins (a vast mountain range in Southwestern British Columbia). It came at a perfect time, i needed some thinking time in a bad way, i was going crazy inside my head... i needed the mouNTAins. So with all my ducks in a row, i packed up my BD Innova50 (her first overnight trip) and headed to the Outdoors.

It saddens me to say that it has been many years since my last backpack trip... 2 months and 5 years to be exact, sure, id done quick overnighters but nothing like this... so i was thrilled! An opportunity to slow things down, take in a little more oxygen, develop beAUtiful new friendships, learn a few more moUNTAIn tricks and well... simPLy refill my loVE TAnk.

There are some hard skills that ive taken away or have served as excellent review/reminders - the importance of planning, organization, risk assessment, basics living (food, warmth, shelter) and team dynamics. There are also some great technical skills that i picked up - weather reading, warm/cold fronts, clouds... map & compass navigation, route finding, land-reading... and much trivial knowledge as well - medieval diseases, mushroom selection, food as a primary source of body heat, Salman Rushdie's tale 'Haroun and the Sea of Stories'.... the list goes on... the triP roCKEd!

one day later....

buNTZen LAke - 5 Peaks Finale.

Today i raced my little heart out, yet i barely moVED :( THA-Thump.THa-Thump..tHA-thUMP!! repeat 100x/min

My heartrate was racing, it seemed impossible to slow it down... whad 'up? i felt anxious, i felt defeated... i knew i had barely ran since Sinister7... but i also knew i lived a very active lifestyle, after all like TOny best said... i quote 'Jude's quads may not be big, but they feels like braided steel cables. seriously.'... So i figured, im good to go... i'll wing it, like everything else... WRONG!... okay, maybe not sooo wrong, however today my body hurt, it was humbling, it was a GREat chance for me to take a closer look at my habits and learn from the many things i did wrong. On a brighter note - tODAy was incredibly aWEsome and sunny... im beginning to really believe that i am not only electrolyte driven but also soLAr POWered... and i did receive the prettiest looking Race award ever for the Series Finale, it was burnt into a beautiful piece of wood.

stORmy shOWers on a duSK Sky.

2010-08-07T21:47:00.000-07:00

TOnight was bEAutiful.... riding into Vancouver on my stealth commuter SMoke (Yellow/Black is the theme... my black bike yellow writting, b/y Crosslites, yellow jacket, black BD Demon, blk toque).

I have in the past ridden the route countless times coming into work from Surrey (39.5km), however now, living in Van... i was coming home. It felt refreshing to slow my ride a little down, take a couple of extra trails and really enjoy the ride.

The skies were dark... Sinister, but the RAin was exhilarating. I had just put a pair of toe clip peddles on my bike, it was aWEsome, i had so much more power and suprisingly, having been only the third time ever using toe clips, i had them figured out by the time i was home. I could easily stop and start, pop into them and control them.... im a believer.... i likE toe clips :)

This riDE was wiCKed... i finally allowed myself time to reLAx and reflect. One thing that was passing through my thoughts was training. *[side step] I like training, i understand that its not for everybody. Some dislike the pressures, the analyzing and the routine... they run, because they loVe the simplicity. but i crave those things in my Life to balance me. I crave the structure, the discipline, i find it helps me function better in the world, it balances the free-spirited aRTist in me.* Which brings me back to training...

I've been struggling with finding trail to run on... my time these days seems oh so tight... filled, so on my ride i had this thought.... 'what if i rode my SMoke to the base of Seymour (~45mins) then ran up the mountain bike trail network... its wickedly technical... 2-3hrs session, i should have no problem scheduling that in at least twice a week?'... i think? Do that all fall/winter and come Costa Rica in January, i'll be in aWEsome physical condition... ahhhhh, i should really also sharpen up my nutrition, that would go a long way.

The final decision these days is to slow my running down this month (more crosstraining), which feels strange, but i do think it'll make me a stronger runner in the end... i always seem to get really excited, but i know good things take time and i hope to have a very long ULtrarunning career...

and kuDOS ---- gaRY RObbins for setting a nEW speed record or 10:08:00 for the notorious WEst COast Trail. (*Gary.. correct the time if im wrong)

baCK iNTo transiTiOn.

2010-08-03T22:53:00.000-07:00

i ran for the first time since sinister7 yesterday evening... it was so natural.

I'll admit i was slighlty dredding putting on my running clothes, filling up my water bottle and hitting the city streets. However, as soon as i stepped off my front step, i knew i had been missing something pretty special. It was sunny, warm, and the streets were full of life.

This morning was incredible... it was my first day on roCK this season. I have been so wrapped up in running that climbing has taken a backseat. We climbed 'Deidre' a classic 6 pitch route up the Chief's Apron. A fun, easy, quick paced 5.8/5.9. The roCK felt solid, i couldn't help but think about Renan Ozturk, and what it would be like to liVe out of my Westy, climb and paint... all day, everyday. The roCK felt as natural as my running stride, okay, well with a few technical bumps.

..... this got me thinking.

perhaps i should back off of my running, head back into base building, do more climbing and fast backpacking... and start to focus towards fall/winter race calendar? ... this season did start early for me (January), maybe, just maybe, my body is asking for a break?

hmmmm.......

Oh, and ThanKS Tom Craik for the tip on coconuts, i had my very first young coconut yesterday... the water was delicious and the meat scrumchase....mmmmmm... i loVE coconuts :) (click to link to a great health benifit article about coconuts .

a random inspiring poem.

The Invitation by Oriah

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.

I want to know what you ache for

and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.

I want to know

if you will risk looking like a fool

for love

for your dream

for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...

I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow

if you have been opened by life’s betrayals

or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain

mine or your own without moving to hide it

or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy

mine or your own if you can dance with wildness

and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes

without cautioning us to be careful

to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.

I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself.

If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.

If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day.

And if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure

yours and mine

and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon,

“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.

I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone

and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here.

I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.

I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself

and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

'Karina, juDE and aL (behind the camera)

up on the Apron at 7am.

because im in LOve with the MOuntain.

2010-07-25T00:07:00.000-07:00

Renan Ozturk

Ambush Cirque
Wind River, WY

the aftermath of Sinister:

physically... i haven't ran in two weeks, facing my first mild injuries and giving it plenty of rest to heal up... thinking bIG picture... Mont Blanc (UTMB) is on my close scope. However i do liVE a very active lifestyles and am always on the move... my walk to the groceries store for example is... 40lbs on my back (my little guy and some food) and 10-15lbs in each arm, uphill 5 blocks to 12th, i could drive... but i enjoy the exertion.

so mentally,

... its always been about the mountains, its were my spirit thrives. For as long as i remember, ive sought adventure, creating magical worlds with my wild imagination. I grew up in a family of four kids plus a twin who didn't get to experience any life, i had two older brothers who guaranteed to toughen me up, they made sure i stood up for myself (they were the only ones allowed to tease me or put me in goal for shooting practice.. i wish i could have grown up in Costa Rica where there is no hockey). My brothers also never wanted their little sis tagging along, so i constantly tried to prove myself worthy, trying to act tough and not ever whine.. or speak, but it didn't matter, i was a nuisance. My sister was eight years older, so for her it was babysitting, she didn't want me around... and since we moved at least once a year, i didn't make many friends. Life was awfully lonely...

... but the Mountains were alWAys full of aDVenture. and so it began, my search for the ultimate unknown and the peaceful comfort in my solitude.

'Why am i running? why am i doing this?

i realize... uLTra running is my gateway into the Mountain. i run for the adventure, i run for the lessons. i run crazy distances because they challenge me and they will help mold me for the Mountains. To help ready my body for the extreme.

Often, certain people always ask.. 'wHAt are you running from?'...

when really they should be asking me... 'whERe are you running to?'

They say that Mountaineering is an old Man's sport, and in part, that's true. Along with age... time... comes adventures.. and lessons and experience. The Mountains have always called me and slowly i make my way to them, gathering my skillset, thickening my mental strength, and creating strong relationships with those you share the LOve.

i am a believer that everyone has an individual path. We walk (sometimes run) a life that is effected by each and every choice we make. When we make too many wrong choices we come to a deadend. Then we start over again and the only thing we can bring back with us, are faint memories of our lessons learned, in hopes, that when in the future, we are faced with a similar challenge, we may have reason and instinct to guide our choices.

(i think) When we do finally reach the end... the Ultimate, all we'll do is look back and appreciate the journey.

*a random side note... im in loVE with a man i have never met,

a man after my heart... his name, Renan Ozturk and he paints the moST beAUTiful moUNTAins, a truely expressive soul that speaks to me in a comforting deep rumble.

its alwAYs been about the jOUrney.

2010-07-16T23:48:00.000-07:00

“The marvelous richness of human experience would lose something of rewarding joy if there were no limitations to overcome. The hilltop hour would not be half so wonderful if there were no dark valleys to traverse.”

I sit for hours trying to break it down, trying to relive it so that i can gather my lessons and grow stronger. I have the hardest time focusing now that Life is hitting me from every direction again. General feeling 'A la Fin' trilled to have achieved so much, disappointed in my navigational skills, excited to see what will come next and thankful to have met some truly beAUtiful people.

the days leading up to S7 (SInister7, a insanely wicked race, a definite repeat)... we're driving 'wiLLOw' the VW Westy just over 1100km to the hidden gem of Blairmore, nestle in the Rockies' Crowsnest Pass valley. Its been hot, really hot... 35'c. We drove all evening, slept in a Walmart lot (*lol*), drove all morning and decided to stop in Sicamous for lunch/stretch/play. WE spend a few hours enjoying the sun and water, a most welcomed distraction from driving. BANG crASh... bOOM...screeeEECH. AS we're driving out, on the road that parallels the highway and joins within a minute, wE hear these loud noises of a semi-truck skidded off the road and cars in severe smush. A minute sooner and we'd of been part of the accident... yikes, it shakes me up.

Mid afternoon, we arrive at a grass field, park and set up the westy. I lay out a blanket and start to shift through my gear for tomorrows adventure. Im stressing over what i might have forgotten..... 'let it go juDE, you'll do fine without' ... im over prepared really... i can't sleep, big surprise, 12:30 in bed... alarm for 5am.

Race morning... 5:37am 'arrrgggg, another one of these races, i should have woken up 40 mins ago... :{... i get dress, eat a PB Apricot sandwich, coffee... bathroom... line up, 'wow, its almost time'.... 'pOW...GO!'

Leg 1... I

start out pretty easy, chitchatting it up with a friend i had met in cOSta RIca... beEP BEEP BEEP... 8 min warm up is over, so my watch says... 'iS it right to have a warm up during a race?' Mellow first leg, so i slowly start to find my comfortable pace within the pack, chitchatting along the way. The freshly oiled dirt roads, are getting to my head in the form of a migraine... yiKES i hope there isn't too many of these roads.... I run into the TA (transition area for the 94 relay teams that are here today, sharing this incredibly huge challenge. The volunteer is getting angry with me... 'This way... this way, this side'.... 'No, no Monsieur im a solo runner, not a relay, i need to be here'.... i guess i had accidental pinned my number on upside down so it read '690' instead of an under 100 number of '069'. The RD, Andrew laughed and pointed it out to me on the 3rd leg, but man was that ever frustrating not to be believed that i was a solo runner, i realize im not your typical Ultrarunner physique, however perhaps thats where my advantage lies??

Leg 2... Yes, we're starting some beAutiful trail up and around the Frank slide area its also where i first meet this guy... LOgan, little did i know at the time that he would become a huge part of my journey.

......

okay....an easy, steady uphill climb, deep into a valley, im running with LOgan off and on, im chatting with different characters along the way... as long as our individual pace kept us together. Pleasant, mid morning leg... finding the zen.....

Leg 3... 32.5kms down, im nice and warmed up, ready to go. My support is stellar, Alex and Cedar roCKed, the whole crowd was cheering, excited volunteers and other support crews and team... the enERGy was infectious. Fuel in: chocolate Lindt ball, pepperoni stick, cookies... fuel, fuel (~300 calories - Beginning of this race i planned to eat as close to 300 calories per hour, i knew i would eventually slow down so i needed to stock up, i also took Peptobismal tabs to help neutralize the gasses in my stomach... to not aggravate my hernia)

Time to go, leg 3 here i come...

Up, up and more up.. wow... steady up.... never ending lol....

i meet back with LOgan, he's in a low... i try to encourage him but im not yet sure of his character... so a few friendly words and on i go... hoping i can somehow get him to pace me, if i was in that position, thats what id want... a pacer.... so up, up and more up through roCKy ATV TRails... we worked through that never ending uphill fiercely, which was wicked because after that LOgan was nothing but strength which help me get through my lows in leg 4... then 5..oh and then 6 and lets not leave out 7. As much as i enjoyed the race, it was certainly a struggle and without the experience or companionship of LOgan...im not sure how i would of crossed that finish.

*[*okay... bear with me, slightly blurry, this either happened during leg 3 or 4]

thunder showers, heavy, heavy raindrops... we watched the hard packed ground become slick, heavy clay, our shoes were gumming up but our spiRits were high... incredible conditions to be running through, i loVE how dry environments breed thunder & lightning.... BCs Okanagan is notorious for its thunderSTOrms.

.. this compared, and then some... wowowww! how cool.

....

.......then we got LoSt...

id like to blame it on the stellar conversation (it flowed so effortlessly), i completely forgot about following the markers, i simply ran... LiStened... shared stories... getting into some beAUtiful downhill, we're feeling greAt so we decide to make time and pick up speed a little... a mutual feeling. *(i felt a very similar, strong connection running with FeRNando in cOSta Rica... a shared breath, a connection of eneRGies.)

eventually... we hit an aid station.. 3rd one on this leg (*i kinda thOUGht there was only two on the leg??)... woh.. somethings not right, we ask the lady pushing snacks our way...

'hoW long till the next TA (transition area)?'

... 'about 21kms.. chocolate or would you like some beef jerky?' she casually responds.

huh? this isn't making any sense, perhaps she's misinformed, lets move on, we should be almost there.

On we go. ..

.. we continue to climb... 'wait, this is odd... we should have hit the TA over 2.5hrs ago... argggg... shucks, that sucKs!! After a debated conversation we decide to turn around and figure a little more out at the aid station :[

by this time we're both slightly irritated and in ill moods (*my deepest apologies to all the relay runners we passed in head hanging, muttering aggression (it was the heat of the moments' realization).

... back at the aid, we converse once again with the aid lady... decide itd be best to radio RD... aWEsome.. long to short... we realize that we were a little... a lot off course, we'd taken a wrong turn and had been running random, looping trails for 2.5hrs.

... tWO options

A - run back the 2.5ish hrs of downhill we just did... yikes!

B - wait for Andrew (RD), head back to TA3 to start leg 4, suck it up and continue.

... well, i guess i could have also called it 'quits', however, i was in it for an aDVenture and an advenTUre was exactly what i was getting.

option B it is.

Leg 4... Up, steep up and more up (i think this is becoming a trend with this course, starting a leg with a huge amount of up, well i have three more legs to test my theory).

** im actually wondering whether the thundershowers were in this leg?? hmmmmm... the kms are starting to all kinda melt together...

Okay, so leg 4 was the mental game - i was faced with the reality of losing my placing in the race. There was no way now, being 3hrs behind that i would make my 17-19hr time goal. I was discouraged, my pace slowed down, i was angry 'stupid girl, why'd you go get lost?', my ego was wounded...' WAIt thats it... my ego was wounded, not my spirit, time to suCK it up and move on. I let it go and it all became a little clearer, i wasn't in this for the prize, the medal or the honor of taking podium (although a $1000 purse is certainly a huge incentive for a starving ultrarunner/artist, ultrarunning athletes get really hungry :)). I was in it for the challenge and the aDVenture; for the chance to challenge my mind and body in such a way that would ultimately create a lesson to grow my character and make me stronger, more resilient to the ruff of the world.

Run, run and run some more.. thats all i can really do at this point, so thats exactly what i did... run run and rUN SOme more. This is good, WE're passing solo runners, our pace is growing stronger, and we're starting to have fun again. Out from the mountains we pop out onto a stretch of highway, aid station #2. WE find out that im still in the running, female #1 is just ahead. LOgan gets really excited.

'juDE, we're gonna catch her, we'll win you that $1000, lets do it'

im simply excited by his energy, ive come to terms that my main goal is not too win its to not give up.... plus i figured with are pace, this was not our spot in the pack and we have 3 more legs to replace ourselves amongst the line... no biggie, lets just stay consistent, no sprinting to catch her, its inevitable, we'll catch her. And, we did TA4, we all came in together. Quick refuel, well, slightly subjective, we must have taken 6-8minutes in there, but at the time it felt quick, i was starting to get tired. 95.5kms and 12 000 feet of elev.gain +some (the 2.5hr detour) finished... woohoo!!! we're getting closer and my body feels great, a slight soreness in my upper quads.

Leg 5... [THE LEG OF NEVER ENDING UP AND THE DEEPEST OF LOWS]

the trend was up, gradual and gentle at first. My stomach was rumbling, i was feeling a little lost. I had completely forgotten where i was at in my calorie and electrolyte intake... had i had too little... too much?? Was i hydrated, was i cold... night was about to fall.

'juDE, lets do our best to stay outta creeks, night is falling and we could be getting cold!'

... 'Yes, good point LOgan. i think im cold enough as it is.'

hoWEver that lasted for...oh..... 2 small creeks and a few mud crevasses. That trail was a mess, we had no choice but too go straight through the creeks and into the mud, the tRAil was dIRty! (but thaNKS to my favorite shoe 'Monsieur cROSslite' my feet dried favorably quick, they hold nothing :)

.. so Yes it started getting dark. WE held out for quite a while before turning on our lights, our vision was adapting just fine. When we finally did, we had a finely tune system... *i have no idea hOW in the world that happened, i had yet to eVER run with a light, nevermind a finely tuned system... i had used my BD sprinter as it had an aweSOme flood light on it in combination with this lightweight, ergonomic handheld (that really was just tethered to my wrist) PT AMP 3. LOgan was the same a headlamp and an incredibly powerful COstco flashlight... (kuDOs on the price savvy find)... that was the best last minute adviced i received from cOAch... 'juDE, bring a small handheld, trust me, you'll want it.' and i did. coACh knows best!

sO my body was moving, my mind had left..

'Why am i running? why was i doing this? what did i need to prove.... to myself? to the world?... but it wasn't about proving myself, it was about testing myself. how strong am i? hOW much can i endure before my mind quits, before i decide that im not good enough, not strong enough, that i can't make a difference.... wasn't gonna happen, i was going to fight to the finish..... okay ... really? waht could i have done.... STOP... and then what? its dark, im climbing up around Crowsnest Mountain, im soacked from all the rain, mud and creeks...??? it was really more a decision of comMOn seNSe... so on we went... foCUs on the one thing i can... moving forward... this will pass, Life is Balance, every high has an equal low, so this low shall eventually come back up....

'Will this flippin' up... eVEr stOP!' Yes, you guessed it up... up and more uP.

By this time we're following glowsticks, we've hit a small downhill section and we're loVing it...

'WAit a sec... i havn't seen a marker in a few?'.... shucks!.. up the down... lol.. baaaaa, what can you do.

FInd the trail and continue upwards...

So finally we arrive at what looks like a wiLD TAilgate party (TA5), Christmas lights hanging, mud pools everywhere, music, loud voices, fire pits.... it was cool and i was soooo spent :( 'hi Al, im sooo glad to see you!' he tells me a few quick stories and does all my fuel thinking for me.....

ChicKen soup...MMMmmmm, coffee, chocolate lindt balls and this incredible ginger juice (courtesy of LOgan) and we're off... tWO more short legs, our spirits are high, im really looking forward to the downhill.

Leg 6... so the next leg was spent chatting about moVIEs, hOW i loVE movies *my current favorite 'FIDO', a hilarious horror/comedy about making zombies house pets, its truly a beAUtiful loVE story :)

*the crazy things you think about when you're sleep deprived and physically exhausted :)

Oddly... im also just starting to realize hOW MUch physical pain my body is in! a LOt! 125kms +some down, ruN, RUN, Run...LEg 6 takes a long time, but its neither here nor there, tolerable at best, painful we just keep moving... bye bye aid station... oh heLLO TA6....

Leg 7... 'stOP, are you kidding me, NO! im just going to move through this TA, i dont need anything, i just need to finish... up, uP... and woww... way more UP! Okay, i get it... this is SInister, its an uphill trend, then i remember the words of a funny man from the day before...' Well the course is half downhill, hahaha', he was right equal up to equal down, lol... im losing it! im so dizzy, step up, stumble.. stumble, step up, arrgggg... LOgans' counting the 100s of meters we're climbing...

' that about 600m behind us, 11.4km to go' :)

He even at one point turn our kms into miles because they sounded shorter...'only 6 miles to go, we're alMOst there.'

So Leg 7 had officially become the lonGESt leg, the lonGESt 12kms of my Life. The crueling up had finally finished, the sky was becoming a light shade of midnight, we were running on this ansolute perfect single track ridge trail, down through a valley, it was all foCUs and determination at this point.

'WAit... light??' had i really just ran through the night? WEll, no kidding it felt like forever.... but i felt calm...

"Well it's a marvelous night for a moondance

With the stars up above in your eyes
A fantabulous night to make romance"

and then.. we hit ROAD... the physically HArdest 7km of the entire race. My chiNS were SCREAMING, my bones felt like they were spilting with every step i took, running on my forefeet was not an option. I had so much swelling in my lower tibia and the tops of my feet (increasingly worsening since leg 5), my feet no longer bent up or down, they were solid stiff, as if casted in fiberglass.

But again... what was i really going to do? STop?? Yah right, ive got 7kms to go, well now closer to 5, im first female, the suns up and i want to sit down... so finish here i push...

'okay LOgan, lets do this!'

just keep running, just keep running...push, push, push....ouCH, ouch... pain box... yes pain box... oucH... just keep running... just keep pushing... run rUN RUn...

the faster i run, the sooner i sit :).....

.....

........YAHHHHHHHH ...

C'EST FINI!

"juDE ULtra & LOgan beAULieu at the Sinister7 finish, July 11 2010"

the aftermath story still to come....

the tOP 10 ways to roCK an ULtra.

2010-07-14T07:00:00.000-07:00

frOm the racers viEw (judes):
10. elements - rain, wind, thunder, sun... throw it all in, the more extreme, the bigger the adVEnture.
9. a catchy, inspirational quote to use when your brain blurs, ex. 'WE find no real satisfaction or happiness in Life without obstacles to conquer and goals to achieve. Believe in your heart, failure comes from not trying at all'
8. small talk with other racer... everyone has an incredible, individual story to tell... Listen, you have many hours to do so :)
7. Nuun & chocolate Lindt balls
6. a wicked support crew that have seen you in your best and your worst, they can help you make the most crucial decisions and keep you going in your toughest times.
5. Determination and reason to complete (a strong purpose to finish the event)
4. 'relentless forward MOMentum' GAry Robbins best advice.
3. the use of JEn Segger's 'PaiN BOx'
2. a deep belief in endless & limitless Possibilities
1. a POSitive & flEXible attitude that can adapt to changing situations.

frOm the support crews viEw (Alex's advice):
10. Drink coffee, its gonna be a long day and night.
9. Talk to everyone, make friends (everyone has such a greAT story) and it helps the time pass. (kindergarden teachers are great with crazy two year olds)
8. Every time a racer comes into the aid station, cheer for them as if they were your own racer, it keeps the mood excited and everyone thinks your nuts (makes you feel right at home with all the ULtrarunner, the 'nuts' part)
7. Eat, so you don't get grumpy, lay off your racer's sugar stash, you'll just crash.
6. More coffee... so you stay awake to help your racer.
5. Bring your VW Westy... if you've misplaced yours make friends with those who have one.
4. bring snow chains, who knows when you'll have to crawl up a mud slide.
3. look forward to any weather conditions, be prepared
2. bring everything to all stations, who knows what your trail-deranged runner might want
1. coffee... race is over, time to celebrate and your racers throwing up.

Sinister7 report and story to come... once i get back home :)

a gnARLy...AWesome day in Hell

2010-06-27T22:13:00.000-07:00

the quick - a day lost, bushwacking through overgrown pricky sh*t trail on a beAUtifully wet coastal paradise for 10 freakin' hours... such mixed feelings!

*photo above: okay my legs don't look outrageous... however they burn and the scrapes are swollen, oh and yes burning... ouch!

8:30am - leaving Panaroma Park in DEep COve. Ryan (a fellow club FatAss'er) and i are heading up the COve lookout trail to run to Elsay lake, this should take no more then 6-7 hours :)

Apparently there used to be a great trail coming out of Deep cove to Elsay then around Seymour and reconnecting with the COve trail... now im no professional bushwacker or orienteerer, i dislike breaking forest trails and prickly plants in their early (calf height) growth cycle, i most often stick to maintained trail networks, im a bit of a princess like that.... but i never whine and certainly never complain. All that said, i did loVE the dozen creek crossings, the freezing water felt like gold on my slashed legs :), all the new forest growth was beautiful and Ryan (first time running together) was super great, AWEsome attitude and bushwacking leader.

So finally, we hit the main-er trail head, thinking we were in the clear there was finally good trail... right to Elsay and left to Seymour? Bushwaking through that last piece of the trail took waaay longer then we had anticipated?!?... left to Seymour it is, we should be out by 4pm no problem.

And then... we hit snow.. loADS of it, so much that we had a super hard time seeing any trail, let alone markers. Then the hugest slope (Canadian Pass, i think they call it), of course there so much FOg (weve been running in rain all day) and we have to traverse this snow covered steep boulder field (massive avalanche zone). SO we spot a marker midway, and cant find the next, so we figure we must go up and around... really quite a logical thought. WE climb what seemed to me 500ft of slick, bad snow in knobby running flats and no ice axes.... im scared sh*tless and im, ill admit it, tearing up. Flashbacks of my huge fall off Mt MacFarlen in june '07 come back... im so scared of steep snow slopes. We cant find trail at the top so we decide itd be best to turn around back to last marker.

'ARE you fREAkin' kidding me... can you see how steep that is we just climbed up... im gonna die' of course this dialogue is all in my head... i hate 'whinners'. suCK it up! Deal

with the fear later... right now - foCUs! WE get down, walk and spot another marker, yes back on track. We must have had only about 5 kms to go but it took us around 4 hrs to make trail...

I cant imagine how i could possibly come close to describing the discomfort i was in today, but all in all, it was incredibly refreshing to have a little adventure... and im thankful to have found my way back in time to watch a scookum presentation on Granville Island called 'Stand Up for Great Bear'... and now relaxing in my warm bed.

oh and... arggg, i ripped the gaitor off of one of my LaSportiva crosslites :( ... that sucks.

follow this link to read Ryan's version of the day, *scroll down to event report.

oh warm sunny HEat... how i miss you!

2010-06-19T00:31:00.000-07:00

A 7pm run last night gave me the chills. Its June 18th and im running in two shirts, armsleeves and a soft shell jackets, what up... In 3 weeks time in hot, alpine July heat, i'll be running my longest distance to date, 146km of notorious Rockies trails in one push. I feel i may be throwing myself to the wolves, feeling underprepared and unbalanced. However, for me, i willingly put myself in such situations to feel the bliss of overcoming such huge challenges. It's sick really, i often observe my mental health and objectively ask.. 'am i crAZy?' the only answer i find comfort in is 'maybe... but all brilliant artist were and committing to running through my 'perceived' personal limits is beAUtifully self-expressive (in a twisted kind-of-way)'.

Backing up to last weekends 5Peaks race, it felt good to run, it felt great to run good trail. The morning however started out a little rough.

I had loaded up the Westy (with our MEC booth & gear) the night before which was also my first night in my new suite. Saturday morning, im an hour early (text message missed) to pick up my MEC crew... i wait at a gas station drinking coffee on the corner of Clark & Broadway :(

GREat! off we go, east on Hastings and up the mountain... sMASHH! Into my WEsty's side door smashes this elephant on rollerskates (the cargo bin of MEC booth goodies and sandbags) Awww, shucks my door panel is all broken :{ my last MEC trip in the WEsty, the 3rd gear syncro went, i drove the 50km home to Surrey without 3rd (thats my 35-65km/hr speed, im sure i pissed off a lot of drivers that day).

..... so we finally arrive at the top of Mt.Seymour, totally frusterated from alternating holding onto the bin around corners (stop any further damage)... and yes, you guessed it... 'Mt.Seymour, wHAT!?! the race is at SFU... sh*T, arggggg', Rain turns to me and says...'juDE, no worries, go with the flow, its the new moon, it messes with our heads :)'

okay.. alright then, don't let it get me down... ive got a booth to set up and a beAUtiful course to run. WE get there with good timing, set up and chit chat it up. REady to run..... off we go, fast and steady we're all headed for some stellar downhill, it flows beautifully... and then, the hills hit. Although i managed to run up 90% of all the hills, i felt weak. My legs were heavy and my heart just wasn't completely in it. I think i prefer to run alone, no one in front and no one behind, that way im not motivated by others' performances... just my own. That's not to say, that i dont enjoy racing... i adore racing, in fact, the races are often my main motivator because i know if i start... im staying till the finish (unless i pass out :) theres just no bailing out of races, no giving into the pain and it just so happens to be my favorite way to see great places... fast. SInister here i come!